Guy #1: Excuse me, I’m sorry to interrupt but can I ask you for a favor?
guy #2: Uh, sure.
Guy #1: I’m trying to raise $2 to buy a forty, can you help me out?
Guy #2: A forty? Uh, I have an orange if you want.
Guy #1: Nah, I live in front of a fruit stand.
–8th Street between 1st & 2nd
Overheard by: E Martinez
Drunk girl: I love scrotum!
Guy: Dude, we should completely ask her to come home with us.
–10th & Broadway
Overheard by: danie
Tourist husband: Sure smells bad around here.
Tourist wife: It says Dog Run.
Tourist husband: A place where dogs race?
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: Innocent XXX
Black cyclist guy: Where’s all the black people around here? Did y’all eat all the black people?
White girl: They taste yummy!
–Houston & West Broadway
Overheard by: alyssa
Girl: Yeah…but I have my period, so we can’t have sex.
Guy: That doesn’t matter. See? It just shows that I love you.
Girl: What it shows is that you want head.
–St. Marks & 3rd
Overheard by: Brock
Girl #1: How bad am I? I’m going to have sex tomorrow and then pay a shiva call.
Girl #2: Who cares? You’ve got needs.
Girl #1: Yeah, I guess you’re right.
Girl #2: Remember when you had a harem?
Girl #1: Yeah, but I didn’t have sex with any of them. I just fooled around with them.
–Bleecker Street Bar
Tourist woman #1: This is a really quaint neighborhood!
Tourist woman #2: Yeah, but it’s really expensive. A small one-bedroom apartment is like $1,000 a month!
Tourist woman #1: Oh, my! Why would someone pay that?
–Bleecker & 11th
Queer: I think I am going to go running.
Girl: Did you masturbate today? You seem very antsy.
–1st Avenute & 10th Street
Overheard by: Abby Nydam
Girl #1: I really need to buy cigarettes. Would they sell them there?
Girl #2: Um…that stands for “General Nutrition Center.”
–10th Street & 7th Avenue
Overheard by: djlindee
Drunk girl #1: He’s totally cute, but I find his moles distracting.
Drunk girl #2: Yeah and he kinda reminds me of a Klingon…I’d still make out with him though.
–Thompson & Bleecker
