Old lady #1: What are you eating? It smells good.
Old lady #2: Nicorette.
–DR2 theater, E. 15th Street
Old lady #1: What are you eating? It smells good.
Old lady #2: Nicorette.
–DR2 theater, E. 15th Street
Guy #1: I realized what the worst food ever is.
Guy #2: What?
Guy #1: Lean Pockets.
–Gold’s Gym, W. 54th Street
Overheard by: Blake Henderson
Woman: So, yesterday I think I ate dog food again.
–Elevator, 90th & Colombus
Overheard by: Louise XIV
Guy: I think your soul would taste awesome.
Chick: Are you saying I’m a bad person?
–1 train
Overheard by: djlindee
Old woman: Can you put five shrimp in a bag for me to hold for a minute and then I’ll give you two back?
Seafood guy: Excuse me?
Old woman: Just put five shrimp in a bag for me, I need to hold it. I get energies from them. Just put five shrimp in a bag and give it to me to hold, and then I’ll give you two back. I get energies.
–Whole Foods, Union Square
Girl #1: Do you want a sandwich?
Girl #2: Making a sandwich on the subway is so ghetto!
Girl #1: Shit girl, we are ghetto.
–A train
Girl: I wonder what kind of cheese they put in these.
Guy: Me too. It’s good.
Girl: What do you think it is?
Guy: Maybe Mozzarella, I’m not sure.
Girl: It doesn’t taste like Mozzarella. I doubt it.
Guy: You’re right. I don’t know. Probably one of them Italian cheeses.
Girl: I wonder. I like it.
–Diner, Astoria
Overheard by: Jenna Vee
Lady: So if I get the eggs, what does that come with?
Waiter: Potatoes, toast…
Lady: What kind of potatoes?
Waiter: French fries.
Lady: What other kind of potatoes do you have?
Waiter: Mashed potatoes, baked potato…
Lady: Oh, those don’t go with eggs. Well, since it’s extra you can leave it off.
Waiter: The potatoes come with the eggs.
Lady: Can I substitute bacon?
Waiter: I can bring you a side of bacon.
Lady: How many strips come in a side, two or three?
Waiter: Three.
Lady: Can I just have two?
–University Restaurant, University Place
Mom: I don’t know why you brought me here. You know there’s nothing here that I can eat.
Chick: What about the steak, Mom? I thought you like steak?
Mom: Goddamn it! You know I forgot my teeth!
–Ruth’s Chris Steak House, W. 51st Street
Lady: Can I get a large chicken noodle soup? Without the chicken.
–Six Happiness, 2nd Avenue
Overheard by: nisey
