American girl: So when does Kitty’s plane get in?
British guy: I don’t know…I think 12:30. I’m really nervous about her moving in.
American girl: Why?
British guy: Because you know she is going to expect me to marry her.
American girl: Well, you need to get married. You need to have little Jack the Rippers running around.
–2nd Avenue between 51st & 52nd
Tourist woman #1: This is a really quaint neighborhood!
Tourist woman #2: Yeah, but it’s really expensive. A small one-bedroom apartment is like $1,000 a month!
Tourist woman #1: Oh, my! Why would someone pay that?
–Bleecker & 11th
Woman: His penis was out, and it was as big as a baseball bat, and it reached his mouth. And all the kids were saying, “What’s that?”.
–New York Aquarium
Old lady #1: What are you eating? It smells good.
Old lady #2: Nicorette.
–DR2 theater, E. 15th Street
Ticket lady: I’m sorry, no pets allowed.
Woman: But even if the dog is in a bag?
–Central Park
Overheard by: armur
Photographer lady: They didn’t de-jowl him, which surprised me.
–Once Upon a Tart, Sullivan Street
Overheard by: Sara T.
B&T guy: Do you know where Ludlow Street is?
Woman: It’s that way, towards Jersey.
–Stanton & Suffolk
Guy: Is this where I get off?
Girl #1: No, 34th Street is next stop.
Guy: I wouldn’t know these things. I’m a tourist.
Girl #2: No you’re not!
Guy: I’m a tourist…from Queens.
–R train
Overheard by: Dani_Nisa
Man: So you went to the Champs Elysee in Paris?
Woman: Yeah, it was cool. Kinda like Madison Avenue, just smaller…
–Frank, 2nd Avenue
Overheard by: Englishman in NY
Woman #1: I should be on that monument.
Woman #2: Why, so you can scare everyone?
–Prospect Park
Overheard by: Jon A.
