Cute, 20-something, professional woman: You know, sometimes I just really wish I knew what it's like to be slutty!


Overheard by: chino latino

Guy, about his job: Right now, we are working on a line where you can make a customized branded dildo to fit your needs.
Woman who just told everyone she is pregnant: That's fantastic!

City Vino Restaurant
Jersey City, New Jersey

Overheard by: entertained witness

Woman to man: She fucked the lobster?

Cincinnati, Ohio

Man: You don't need that booze!
Woman: I know, but I'm getting it.
Man: Just don't drink the fun out of it.

Edwardsville, Illinois

Overheard by: M

Loudspeaker in airport: Please don't leave your belongings unattended.
Crazy lady, to no one: Did they just say homosexuality isn't allowed in the airport?

Oakland, California

Overheard by: Kristina

Woman #1: What do you think ranch dressing goes good on?
Woman #2: Ball sack.

Fayetteville, Arkansas

Overheard by: So What?

Lady to man putting bagels in a bag: Are you getting those because you are Jewish?

Whole Foods
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: jigawhat

Loud woman #1: My friend is on that. When you fart, it makes you shit oil.
Loud woman #2: Really?
Loud woman #1: Yup, you shit oil and grease.


Overheard by: grossed out

Tourist lady, as train approaches the end of the line: So how are they going to turn this train around?
Daughter: They don't have to. It can go in either direction.
Tourist lady: Well, are they at least going to turn the seats around?

Washington, DC

Customer having lunch: Can I smoke at this table?
Waitress: Honey, you're in Nevada. You can smoke, gamble, drink, screw and cuss. Just don't kill nobody!

Bucket of Blood Saloon
Virgina City, Nevada

Overheard by: Philly Joe