Suit #1: I am in a crazy mood right now.
Suit #2: Crazy meaning…? “Shoot ’em up” or more “naked pool swimming”?
–Jazzy’s, Varick Street
Overheard by: andrea marshall
Suit #1: I am in a crazy mood right now.
Suit #2: Crazy meaning…? “Shoot ’em up” or more “naked pool swimming”?
–Jazzy’s, Varick Street
Overheard by: andrea marshall
Businessman lady #1: See, she always finds a way to make things about her!
Businessman lady #2: Um, she just found out she has cancer.
Businessman lady #1: So? I am getting married, it should be all about me, focus all on me. Now we have to make it about her! Ugh.
Businessman lady #2: You’re not getting married till next year.
Businessman lady #1: I know that, but I am getting married. Anyway, cancer is like the flu, almost everyone is going to get it. She is not going to die from it.
Businessman lady #2: I can’t believe you. You are so crass sometimes. Ugh.
Businessman lady #1: Oh, shit! What if she really does die? Then it will really be all about her. Crap.
–Wall & Water
Girl: Hey, fancy seeing you here! Where do you work?
Guy: Wall Street.
Girl: Where are you coming from?
Guy: A business meeting. I’m so wasted!
–C train
Suit: Can you move a little?
Teen girl: I can’t. My hair’s stuck in the door.
Suit: Oh. That’s a good reason. Okay.
–L train
A black HS girl pushes her way past a white yuppie to get off the train.
Yuppie: Whoa, slow down, Boniva!
Girl: Shut the fuck up, Opie!
–L train
Hobo: You man, got a dollar?
Suit: Yeah, got change for a hundred?
–Water & Wall
Suit #1: …so I went to her house and she was still begging and I kept saying “no”, and then she–
He makes a handjob gesture.
Suit #1: –and then I went home.
Suit #2: Have you seen [Laura], the new chick in the office?
Suit #3: I probably shouldn’t be saying this since I’m Vice President, but she’s got a great figure on her.
–S train
Overheard by: Michelle
Asian suit: They were talking about how these 7th grade girls were trading blowjobs for pot.
White suit: When I was in 7th grade, I didn’t even know what pot was, or what blowjobs were. I was too busy playing video games and watching Star Wars.
Asian suit: I was in SAT prep class.
–51st & Lexington
Snack guy: Peanuts! Get your peanuts here! Buy one, get the second for the same price!
–Yankee Stadium
Overheard by: HelloClairice
Suit #1: He basically crawled up my ass and started punching me from the inside.
Suit #2: Nice picture, dude. Christ.
–Yankee Stadium
Overheard by: Brett
Girl on cell: I’m here in Harlem right next to Yankee Stadium.
–4 train
Woman: It’s a good thing we got here early. I don’t want to miss the kickoff.
–Shea Stadium
Chick #1: Boo, you’re gonna miss!
Chick #2: Aren’t you cheering for the wrong team?
Chick #1: I wasn’t cheering, I was making an ominous prediction.
–Richmond County Ballpark
Overheard by: Becka Dash
Guy #1: I thought that girl was his daughter. He has to be in his 50s.
Guy #2: I know, it’s skeeving me right out.
Guy #1: What do you think? She’s 22 or 23?
Guy #2: Dude, she’s a hard 18 tops.
–Yankee Stadium
Overheard by: Todd Horan
Asian man: Excuse me, do you know where is the Staten Island Ferry?
Suit: Yeah, just keep walking in this direction along the water. It’s the big orange motherfucker, you can’t miss it.
–Battery Park
Suit: I mean, I felt like a complete idiot. I had no idea. You go to the Met and they’ll just give you a wheelchair. All this time I’ve been walking around the damn place! You don’t even have to have a note saying you’re handicapped or something.
–2nd Avenue & 13th Street
