Cute 20‐something Asian girl: I have a butt plug in right now.
Slightly older male college student: Can I have your number?
–34th & Broadway
Cute 20‐something Asian girl: I have a butt plug in right now.
Slightly older male college student: Can I have your number?
–34th & Broadway
Girl to friend: Is there a way to block fat people on OkCupid?
–Bedford Ave & 8th
Girlfriend to boyfriend: Remember the other day when you told me I had a fat ass and I didn’t curse you out? So now you gonna buy me something.
–Pizzeria, 77th St & 1st Ave
Overheard by: Eric
Older woman waiting for a seat: Oh good, the fat one got up. Shit, an even fatter sits down.
–JFK Airport
Overheard by: Henry Pena
Posh‐looking Asian chick: But he consumed over 6,000 calories a day, so he deserved whatever he had coming.
–Park Slope
Overheard by: Ladle
White hip‐hopper on cell: Yeah, she’s so big I thought there was two of her. Then I realized she was a dude!
–Broome & Forsyth
Overheard by: Terry
Random thug: How you doin’?
Asian girl: (ignores him)
Random thug: You Asian? Or are you Chinese?
Asian girl: Neither! (walks away)
–Queens
Overheard by: Long Island white boy
Black bag lady: Oh, look, I like this samurai boy here…
Attractive Asian man, passing: Ah, thank you for getting the cultural reference right!
Black bag lady: You married?
Attractive Asian man, walking away: No, I’m gay!
–Long Island City
Asian woman #1 (reading ad for tv show): This looks kind of like Dynasty. You know, rich people stabbing each other in the back.
Asian woman #2: Oh, please. Look – the whole cast is white. I see conniving white people all day at work: why watch them again when I get home?
–4 Train
Overheard by: Iris K.
Proud Asian father to friend: And my little one here, he’s going to be a football player when he grows up!
Little Asian boy: No way, Jose! I’m gonna be a Power Ranger!
–East Flatbush, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Frado
Old lady tourist: Excuse me sir, do you know where the Chinatown is?
Flaming gay Asian guy: Yeah. It’s downtown. Just follow the smell, girl… Follow that smell!
–Canal St
Overheard by: InShock
Asian nerd #1: … Of course, ’cause I’d rather all of them have my DNA and not some other random person’s!
Asian nerd #2: No, of course, dude, I totally agree.
–NYU
Suit #1: So now the mayor wants this new festival.
Suit #2: Oh, yeah? Which one?
Suit #1: The Asian Heritage festival, whatever the hell that means.
–Chambers & Broadway
Overheard by: Chandini Davis
Girl on cell: So I told her I didn’t think George Washington was a cannibal.
–Barnes & Noble, Staten Island
Overheard by: Marina Tricorico
Asian girl to friend: You know, if he really likes you, he’d eat you.
–Coles Sports Center
Overheard by: Alice Huang
Hysterical woman screaming at cops: She bit me! I did not touch her!
–84th & Broadway
Overheard by: rachel
Dude: Remember that crazy condo lady? She totally ate my ass on the first date.
–Chelsea
20‐something guy on cell: have you ever tasted pee before?! Word?!
–Spring & W Broadway
Three‐year‐old girl: Daddy, I’m eating your eyeballs!
–R Train
Overheard by: Jon A.