Asians

Asian guy #1: She's the kind of woman who stands to the side, but she's also the kind of woman who talks shit behind your back.
Asian guy #2: Yeah, traditional Asian bitch.

UCSD
San Diego, California

Asian woman: You know, I'm not normally a lesbian. I was just scoping out the competition last night!

Christchurch
New Zealand

Skinny Asian kid buying 24-pack of Keystone Light, to friend: I dunno man. I've never played beer pong against a black dude before.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/379793885/you-dont-know-what-youre-missing.html

Overheard by: Ian

Quirky lesbian professor leading class in Kegel exercises: And everybody squeeze, hold, hold…release and squeeze, two, three…release.
Ditzy Indian, after shiver spasm: It gives me the willies!
Quirky lesbian professor: It's great, right!

Health Ed Class
Borough of Manhattan Community College, New York

Overheard by: Trying not to laugh at all the serious faces trying to hide these private exercises

Curious friend: Doesn't your mouth get tired?
Small Asian girl: That's what my hands are for!
Curious friend: Don't your arms get tired?!
Small Asian girl: That's what my mouth is for!
Curious friend: What do you do when both get tired?
Small Asian girl: Oh, that's when he puts it in my butt.

Hoboken, New Jersey

Nerdy girl to Asian friend: I mean, it was pathetic. I could've had my top off and had a sign around my neck that said “free blowjobs” and they wouldn't have noticed. They were all crowded around Mike watching him play Pokemon.

Chicago, Illinois

Asian #1, watching Asian driver: Asian drivers suck!
Asian #2: Dude, you are one!
Asian #1: Oh, yeah.

Queen Street
Auckland
New Zealand

White girl: Bite his face!
Asian girl: Ew, no! It's all hairy!
White girl: Sometimes you need to do things that you don't like. Like biting a hairy face, for example. Or putting balls in your mouth to get back your Breakfast Club movie…
Asian girl: Oh, you poor thing.

New Jersey

Asian guy: I mean, I'm a nice guy, but I'ma fucking kill you.

Syracuse, New York

Overheard by: Tucker

Korean girl: You know, I can’t tell us apart, either.
Chinese girl: Yeah, I just think everyone’s Chinese.

High school bathroom
Newmarket, Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: slightly relieved