Bike Messenger guy: You see that? I almost died.
Bystander guy: Yeah, man. Those cabs. They fucked up, man. They think they own this city.
Bike Messenger guy: They’re wrong, though. It belongs to me.
–6th Avenue & W. 4th Street
Bike Messenger guy: You see that? I almost died.
Bystander guy: Yeah, man. Those cabs. They fucked up, man. They think they own this city.
Bike Messenger guy: They’re wrong, though. It belongs to me.
–6th Avenue & W. 4th Street
Driver: Hey man, are you a cab driver?
Cabbie: No, I’m a taxi driver.
–Cab, Astoria
Bus driver: The stop after this will be the next one. We should be arriving in a week to ten days.
–M42 bus
Overheard by: Dan Alcalde
Transit cop: I guess I’ll pretend to do something here.
–Queens Plaza station
Conductor: Passengers, please do not use your valuables, or your child, to stop the train doors from closing!
–1 train
Black guy: I got me a ghetto Gold Card, son. It’ll get you on the train, it’ll get you on the bus.
–A train
Overheard by: Timothy C
Loudspeaker: Would anyone that speaks Chinese please report to the Amtrak Information booth in the center of the Terminal? Anyone that speaks Chinese.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: P. Mills
Chick: The cabdriver wouldn’t let us leave the cab unless I showed him
my tits. That is so my away message tomorrow!
–LIRR train
Overheard by: Steve Carbo
Pilot: Ladies and gentlemen, I apologize for the delay in landing the aircraft, but the air traffic controller here at LaGuardia is an angry, bitter man.
–over LaGuardia
Overheard by: Dana Clair
Pedicab guy: It’s a great day for a ride in Central Park. Want a ride?
Man: How much to the Bronx?
–Columbus Circle
Asian guy: But it’s the 21st century!
White guy: That’s true, but there’s always a place for racism.
–13th between 7th & 8th
Overheard by: E. Jung
A preppy boy whistles and waves at a cab. The cab ignores him, and as it passes the boy yells: What’s your problem, am I Black or something?
–Park & 55th
New Yorker: You drove like a maniac. Do you have any idea what the speed limit is in New York?
Cabbie: Cab drivers do not have speed limits in New York.
–Lincoln Center
Overheard by: Peter
Little girl to father, about pedestrian sign: But I don't want to be a pedestrian! I want to be famous!
–17th & Irving
(pedestrians are crossing when they aren't supposed to. One almost gets hit by a taxi)
Female traffic cop to taxi driver: Next time, just go ahead and run them over.
–Columbus Circle
Overheard by: momes
Homeless man directing traffic in middle of street: I killed 20,000 people, I ain't afraid of no car! I killed 20,000 people, I ain't afraid of no car!
–Jerry Orbach St
Gangster walking in front of Range Rover: Fuck it, if I'ma getting hit by a car, I'ma getting hit by a nice car.
–Broadway & Houston
Tourist driving car: I don't give a fuck if you own the world! I'm running your ass over!
–Financial District
Overheard by: lex
Woman: If you don’t stop hitting the fucking brakes like that, I’m gonna throw up all over the back of your cab.
Cab driver: Oh yeah? Go right ahead, lady!
She did.
–Cab, 34th & Lexington
Overheard by: Her friend, who was also kicked out of the cab
Cop to cabbie: Hurry up, you Arabian fuck! Dumbass towel-heads…
Tourist mom: Do you have to use that language? There are children present.
Cop: Lady, shut up. This is New York — either get with it or get out.
Tourist mom: This never would have happened back in Kansas City.
–Rockefeller Center
Cabbie: So, uh, you hear about the double team? The, uh, Democrats?
Passenger: Oh, so Democrats got the Senate, too?
Cabbie: Yes! It’s like a twelve-inch penis!
–Northbound 1st Ave from Delancey
Overheard by: dumbstruck passengers
