Teen boy #1: Whoa, you know what I just realized? ATM is MTA backwards.
Teen boy #2: What’s MTA?
–Flushing
Teen boy #1: Whoa, you know what I just realized? ATM is MTA backwards.
Teen boy #2: What’s MTA?
–Flushing
Woman: Why are there always those hippie wierdos at Union Square Park?
Man: Oh, you mean the ones that play hacky sack all day?
Woman: Yeah, those people.
Man: And those people who sell their artwork on the sidewalk…
Woman: Yeah, exactly! You see them all over Union Square.
Man: Well, it’s clear where they come from.
–Barnes & Noble, Union Square
Overheard by: Jennifer Cee
FishBowlNY chick: Not only do you blog about everything, you blog in five different blogs about everything.
–Slainte, The Bowery
Hipster guy: Everyone keeps asking me why I’m sad, and I’m like, “I’m not sad, I’m from New York.”
–St. Mark’s between 1st & A
Overheard by: Danny G.
Woman: I have some friends, and they lived in Brooklyn all they lives, and they ain’t ever been to Kings Plaza Shopping Mall. They so limited!
–5 train
Tourist woman: Excuse me, can you tell me where the big apple is?
–43rd & Broadway
Overheard by: katie cunningham
Woman: What I love most about New York is that wherever you go, in every neighborhood, there’s garbage on the curb. To me, that’s democracy.
–University & 11th
Lady: You never see girls wearing shorts in New York City unless they’re tourists.
–57th & Broadway
Guy on cell: Well I’m sorry, Princess, if New York doesn’t smell like a bed of roses!
–Church & Worth
Overheard by: Becka Dash
NY Post guy: This boat is bootlegged! It won’t turn left!
–Penn Station
NY Post guy: Read all about it! Discovery shuttle is a bootleg…doesn’t work…can’t turn left. Read all about it!
–Penn Station
Overheard (correctly) by: Toon
Girl on cell: Mom! Guess what? We are having a full moon in New York tonight.
Girl #2: You so stupid…it’s everywhere!
–Park Slope
Overheard by: Jim Chambers
Tourist mom: First the Muppets took Manhattan, now us!
–Marriott Marquis, Times Square
Overheard by: G. Star
Tourist lady: What floor are the Renaissance paintings on?
–MoMA
Guy: …it’s the same as terrorism. If we’re against terrorism, then we’re against tourism.
–50th & 8th
Overheard by: B. Howard
Tourist guy: I’ll have two of your ordinary coffees for purchase.
–Dunkin’ Donuts, Penn Station
Overheard by: devila
Aussie woman: Excuse me…Can you tell me how to get to Greenwich Village?
–5th Avenue & 8th Street
Tourist lady: …and then we went to that big church. You know, the big one? St. Peter’s. The one the Kennedys went to. It’s on 5th street. It’s, like, the largest church in the world or something.
–Central Park East
Tourist guy: Oh, we definitely saw all the important things in the city today. I think the best was F.O.A. Schwartz though.
–Mulberry Street
Overheard by: Bernie Mc
Tourist guy: Hey, is that Central Park?
–Union Square
Overheard by: Chris Ghirardi
Tourist chick: Hey, is that Central Park?
–42nd & 6th
Overheard by: Beks
Tourist boy: Mom! We’re almost at double-u twenty-four street!
–M20 bus
Girl on cell: Let’s wear matching polo shirts and film each other eating with handheld digital cameras! Oh sorry, I’m in Times Square, and I was beginning to think that kind of behavior was normal.
–Times Square
Teen tourist boy: This ain’t no Chinatown. Shit.
–Broadway & Broome
Overheard by: Aileen Gallagher
Tourist guy: Excuse me! Are you a New Yorker?
Woman: No!
–34th & 7th
Man: Do you want to go into any of these shops?
Woman: Um…
Man: Oh, that’s a yes. Whenever a woman responds with anything other than an emphatic “no”, it means yes.
–78th & Madison
Man on pay phone: Maria! I just got out of the doctor’s office. They told me I have herpes and I got them from you!
–34th Street station
Overheard by: Cristalle Stutrud
Woman: You wiped your nose with a tissue, held a tissue in the same hand, and then put your hands all over my papers. What’d you think I was going to do?
–Penn Station
Player: Yo, baby. New York’s a scary place. How about you hold my hand going down the street and make us both feel better?
–34th & 7th
Fat dude on cell: Girl, take that fucking dildo out of your pussy and talk to me!
–4th Street between 1st & 2nd
Overheard by: Andrea Quijano
Fratboy: Zack is cool, until he starts grabbing my ass.
–Bensonhurst
Crazy man: You know what your problem is? You’re not drinking enough milk…from a penis!
–South Street Seaport
Overheard by: Victor Preuninger
A white guy in a suit hangs from the center bar upside-down on a crowded train for about five stops.
Hobo: And you all think I’m crazy.
–6 train
Overheard by: paulybrklynny
A crazy man is walking around with headphones and a walkman trying to interview people, using the walkman as a microphone.
Crazy man: Who loves New York? I love New York! How about you…Who loves New York?
He holds the “mic” up to the guy.
Guy: Is this for ABC?
Crazy man: Fuck ABC, Fuck NBC, Fuck CBC. This is me. Who loves New York?
–31st & 6th
Overheard by: P. Mills
Guy #1: You’ll figure it out when you move here…it’s like, I opened my first electic bill and said, “Wow, I really live in New York now!”
Guy #2: Right, it’s like when you’re killing someone with an axe, and you’re just hacking, and hacking, and hacking, and some blood splashes on your face and you’re like, “Oh yeah, I’m murdering someone!”
–E train
Overheard by: Kid W
Woman: Well, you know what I think? I think that the girlfriend has to die.
–Hudson Street elevator
Overheard by: Greg Rutter
Guy on cell: Yeah, the dude got shot in the face. Isn’t that awesome?
–Madison Square Park
Overheard by: toon
