Girl: We should totally start pretending to go out and make out in public, and then everyone will be like, “But I thought Mark was gay?”. And they’ll all be so confused.
Mark: Okay, I’m down, but you’re gonna have to get me like 6 shots of Jagermeister before we start.
Girl: Why do you need to be drunk? I’m pretty!
–116th Street 1 station
Girl: Look, Rocafella Plaza is right there!
Guy: Where? I don’t see shit.
Girl: I hope you can see if you step in it
Guy: Actually I smell shit right now, do you smell that shit?
Girl: Yeah I do, but I bet you can’t see it.
–49th & 5th
Overheard by: Christine Rinaldi
Charity mugger: Excuse me, do you have a minute to talk about Children International?
Guy: Yeah…right.
Charity mugger: You don’t have to be such a jerk about it.
Guy: Actually I do. You see, that’s sort of my thing.
–Union Square South
Overheard by: stu-ee
Howard Dean: …I think Ferrer can win–
Man: Mr. Dean! I would have voted for you, man!
Howard Dean: …Thanks…
Man: I would have voted for you if you remove all the poison in your
body!…I would have voted for you if you loved America! You would have been a great president, but only if you weren’t so poisonous!
Howard Dean: …Thanks…
–20th & Park
Overheard by: Steve Gartland
Guidette #1: So I called her and she says, “I gotta get off the phone, I’m naked, wet from the shower” and she started mumbling.
Guidette #2: That’s just like her. She’s always naked with something in her mouth.
–Downtown Brooklyn
Overheard by: Koaloha
Suit #1: …so I went to her house and she was still begging and I kept saying “no”, and then she–
He makes a handjob gesture.
Suit #1: –and then I went home.
Suit #2: Have you seen [Laura], the new chick in the office?
Suit #3: I probably shouldn’t be saying this since I’m Vice President, but she’s got a great figure on her.
–S train
Overheard by: Michelle
Ticket lady: I’m sorry, no pets allowed.
Woman: But even if the dog is in a bag?
–Central Park
Overheard by: armur
Girl: Oh my God! I meant to tell you!
Guy: What?
Girl: Yesterday I was walking on 5th Avenue and this horde of middle-aged women stopped me to ask where I got my Ralph Lauren shirt.
Guy: No way!
Girl: It was great.
Guy: The one with the big horse on it?
Girl: It’s a pony, not a horse!
Guy: What’s the difference?
Girl: It’s different.
Guy: Can you explain the difference?
Girl: No.
–Rockefeller Center
Overheard by: pixelvisions
Girl: This isn’t right. We’re supposed to be on Murray Street.
Guy: Dude, you know I’m dyslexic!
–Warren & Greenwich
Man: So you went to the Champs Elysee in Paris?
Woman: Yeah, it was cool. Kinda like Madison Avenue, just smaller…
–Frank, 2nd Avenue
Overheard by: Englishman in NY
