Chick #1: … I don’t know…
Chick #2: Trust me — he wants it, but he’ll never ask. You do it by surprise, and he’ll, like, cum all over you.
Chick #1: It just seems nasty.
Chick #2: Yeah, it’s nasty — that’s why guys like it! And I guess it feels good. I mean, boy dogs lick their own, right?
–21st St & 8th Ave
Overheard by: Manhattman
Chick on cell: What did you say?…What did you say?…What did you say?…What did you say?…I can’t believe you said that. Say it again!…I haven’t spoken to you in so long and I finally fuckin’ call and that’s what you have to say?…Well fuck you, you fuckin’ bitch!
–F train
Overheard by: Tamika J.
Bitch: Oh hi! We were just speaking very poorly about you!
–Art Gallery, SoHo
Overheard by: Tibbie X
Teen boy #1: Yo man, I’m gonna join a gang!
Teen boy #2: Ah, ya? What gang?
Teen boy #1: Aladdin Kings.
Teen boy #3: What the fuck kinda Disney gang is that? Latin Kings, man! Latin Kings!
–A train
Technophobic lady: There was some crazy lady talking to herself in the bank.
Tech‐Savvy lady: Are you sure? Did she have a Bluetooth?
Technophobic lady: I don’t think she had any teeth.
–54th & 10th
Man reading book: Oh, what stop is this?
Man exiting train: 96th Street. By the way, you really do have the most beautiful hands and fingers I’ve ever seen.
Man reading book: Oh, thanks.
–96th St station
There is a Buddha statue on the counter.
Teen girl #1: Wow, she has weird nipples.
Teen girl #2: I think it’s a guy.
Teen boy: That’s Gandhi. Duh.
–99 cent store, Hylan Boulevard
Overheard by: Stacey Simon
Guy: You kicked me like a pony in the neck! Now I’m going to be slow for my entire life. You kicked me in the cerebellum!
Chick: That’s not where your cerebellum is.
–Eugene O’Neill Theater
Overheard by: Nicole Thompson
Black guy #1: She’s beautiful. Somewhere between Faith Evans and Beyonce.
Black guy #2: Faith Evans? That don’t sound beautiful.
Black guy #1: Well you know, shape of the face is like Faith, and she’s got that hair and skin like Beyonce. But she’s really smaller than Faith. Her body is amazing. She’s Caribbean.
Black guy #2: Oh. Yes. Caribbean. They do good work.
Black guy #1: Mm‐hmm. They do good work all right. Good work!
–Madison Square Park
Blonde: Fine, whatever, then I’ll just paint a picture of your family so we never need to fucking talk about this again.
Brunette: You just don’t get it!
–The Met
