Queer guys

Queer: My sister is so concerned about her son playing with dolls because it will turn him gay. I’m like, “It’s not because I was playing with dolls that I was gay, it was that I looked at a guy and got a hardon!”.

–Japonica, University Place

Overheard by: Rick T

Fashionista: …he was amazing! It’s so rare to find a man familiar with Dr. Hauschka’s.
Queer: You’re in Chelsea, hon.

–18th St. bet. 7th & 8th

Overheard by: alicia

Patron: They know what I am: drunk, gay, and in search of food!…This tastes like cock!

He was later escorted out of the restaurant with his friends.

–Dawat, E. 58th St.

Overheard by: MissHell

Queer: Thursday nights are the best nights if you like NYU Guys!

–11th St. & 1st Avenue

Overheard by: Rachel W

Queer #1: …so essentially if I didn’t get accepted to NYU for law I would have become a magician.
Queer #2: Really?
Queer #1: Yeah. I have the hat and scarves and everything.

–Dojo, Greenwich Village

Guy on cell: It’s not like I sucked some guy’s dick last…oh wait, I did!

–Houston & Lafayette

Overheard by: a.alvarez & c.palmatier

Guy: I’m sorry, I left my foundation at home today.

–The Flame, Clinton

Overheard by: Sandy

Girl #1: So you mean he’s gay?!
Girl #2: Yeah, he’s gay, he’s gay, he’s gay, he’s gay!
Girl #3: Oh my god, Oh my god, Oh my god, Oh my god…
Girl #4: Oh my god, Oh my god, Oh my god, Oh my god, Oh my god…
Girl #2: He’s gay, he’s gay!

–81st St. B/C station

Overheard by: Tommy Wooh

Guy: But you have to promise, promise, promise, promise you won’t tell anyone.
Girl: I promise.
Guy: Yeah, but promise promise promise?
Girl: I promise promise!
Guy: All right. [Sam]’s gay.

–57th & 6th

Overheard by: Heather

Girl: Let’s get one thing straight…
Guy: I’m not.
Girl: Wait, what?…oh my fucking lord, everyone is fucking gay now! I’ll see you in hell.

–Soho

Older Hispanic gay man to guy in Subway sandwich costume: Uh sandwich, be careful someone doesn't eat you, darling.
Passers-by: (laugh)
Older Hispanic gay man: Whaaat? That's what you do to a saaandwich.

–9th & 2nd

Overheard by: eat me

Queer: I hate that I missed your birthday.
Artsy girl: Brad, you were at my 21st birthday party. You gave me that paint-it-yourself Menorah.
Queer (laughing): Oh yeah… Did you ever paint it? Do you still have it?
Artsy girl: Actually, it broke. Lee gave me these thongs as a present, and they somehow got all tangled up and it fell…
Queer: Wait… Are you telling me my Menorah died by thong?

–M Train

Overheard by: Not such a bad way to go

Gay man in hipster glasses, sticking ass out: Papi! It hurts! Open it up and see what's wrong!
Blonde white girl, whining: But what does that meeeeeeannnnn?

–Bleecker & Perry