Girl: I don’t know if he’s straight or gay, I can’t tell.
Guy: You know that saying “innocent until proven guilty”? Well, everyone at Pratt is gay until proven straight.
–Hoyt-Schermerhorn station
Overheard by: Peter F.
Girl: I don’t know if he’s straight or gay, I can’t tell.
Guy: You know that saying “innocent until proven guilty”? Well, everyone at Pratt is gay until proven straight.
–Hoyt-Schermerhorn station
Overheard by: Peter F.
A woman at the next table is eating kielbasa with cole slaw.
Queer: Ew, that is so gross!
Woman: Do you want to know what’s gross? Sucking on someone’s cock that has just been in your ass.
–Veselka, 2nd Avenue
Chick: Yo, I don’t mind sharing some pussy so long as she ain’t my wife. If she’s my wife, then I ain’t sharing pussy!
–Time Warner Center
Office girl: So if you’re Bonnie, then who’s your Clyde?
Boss guy: I’m so not the femme.
Office girl: Totally.
Boss guy: I need a guy a little more faggy than me but not like, say, Tom Cruisey or Richard Simmonsy.
Office girl: Wait, who’s more faggy than Richard Simmons?
–Office, West 52nd Street
Overheard by: GeeGoo
Girl: Oh my god, you skullfucked a snowman? That definitely was porn!
Guy: It wasn’t porn, it was art. I was covered in blue glitter.
Girl: Sweetie, that just makes it gay porn.
–Times Square
Queer #1: I can’t believe he wouldn’t go out with me.
Queer #2: Well, he didn’t think you could play the bongos. And he was right.
Queer #1: I know, but it’s not like I can’t learn.
Queer #2: Oh God, you’re giving me a boner.
–Greenwich & West 12th
Girl: We should totally start pretending to go out and make out in public, and then everyone will be like, “But I thought Mark was gay?”. And they’ll all be so confused.
Mark: Okay, I’m down, but you’re gonna have to get me like 6 shots of Jagermeister before we start.
Girl: Why do you need to be drunk? I’m pretty!
–116th Street 1 station
Queer #1: He told me he had an 8 inch penis.
Queer #2: Oh really?
Queer #1: It was only 8 inches if he put it in twice.
–L train
Overheard by: Marcus and Nate
Fratboy #1: How are the pledges this year?
Fratboy #2: Oh man, we got two gay pledges, and they are so in love with each other.
–7 train
Overheard by: Brian
Queer #1: I like being a corporate lawyer. Being “The Man” is awesome.
Queer #2: Because you’re not “the man” in the bedroom.
–Therapy, W. 52nd Street
