Gays and Lesbians

Not Quite Absolutely Fabulous

Chick: He was not really completely gay.
Guy: What was he, then?
Chick: He was more just completely fabulous.

–10th & Broadway

Overheard by: jennifer

Girl: I’m pathetic enough but not fabulous enough to be a fag hag.

–The Ansonia, 73rd & Broadway

Overheard by: Betty Noir

Girl #1: You shouldn’t feel sorry for yourself. We are single and fabulous, explanation point.
Girl #2: …Don’t you mean “exclamation point”?

–Garden Cafe, Inwood

Guy #1: …I walked in and the warehouse was just full of tiny little boots.
Guy #2: That sounds fabulous.

–Central Park

Not Gay, But Likes the “Tourist” Double Entendre

Guy #1: So we’re entering the West Village.
Guy #2: Oh yeah?
Guy #1: Yeah…it’s sort of…the gay part of town.
Guy #2: Yeah? So…is there, like…a gay bar in the area we could go to?

–Washington Square Park

Overheard by: kjd

These Boots Are Made for Worshippin’

Queer: Do you know why else I want to move to London? Camdentown. There are lots of punks.
Chick: But wouldn’t there also be a lot of white supremacists?
Queer: I could do white supremacists.
Chick: But aren’t they also homophobic?
Queer: No, just repressed.

–Law office, 50th & 8th

Wednesday One-liners Get Cocky

Woman: His breath stinks. It smells like…it smells like shit to me. He’s gay, that’s why. He’s always suckin’ it, you know.

–Delancey Street station

Overheard by: Palaverist

Trying to Fit In, post-Village People

Construction guy #1: Then we gotta fuckin’ knock down that bitch of a fuckin’ wall…in this fuckin’ humidity, can you fuckin’ believe they’re makin’ us do that shit?
Construction guy #2: I know. That fuckin’ shit is fuckin bullshit. We should fuckin’ kill the fuckin’ captain and shit, makin’ us take down a fuckin’ wall that we fuckin’ put up in the–
Construction guy #1: Ooh! Italian ices!

–57th & 10th

Overheard by: Peter Shankman

Wednesday One-liners Are Questioning

Chick: If you don’t want to look like a lesbian at the party, make sure you stay a little drunk the whole time.

–57th & 5th

Overheard by: Annie

Rick James’ Wednesday One-liners

Queer: That bitch thinks he’s some Andy Warhol superstar! Fuck him bloody!

–Ludlow & Houston

The Bosom Buddies Movie Looks Really Dumb

Yuppie guy #1: I’ll have a strawberry margarita. As fruity as possible. I just cover it up with a wife and kids.
Yuppie guy #2: Hey, I’m married, and I’m still not comfortable with my sexuality.
Yuppie guy #1: Really?

–79th Street Boat Basin

Overheard by: Andrea Natalie Goldstein

Depends on If You’re a Top or Not

Tween girl #1: His hair is sometimes awful, but it’s sometimes so perfect.
Tween girl #2: I think that’s what gay hair is like.

–Prospect Park

Overheard by: emily clinch

Weathering Wednesday One-liners

Woman: This air is so thick I can’t breathe it. It actually will not fit in my nostrils.

–125th Street A/C/B/D station

Overheard by: Rose Fox

Guy: It’s a beautiful night for global warming.

–Bleecker & Bowery

Man: Isn’t it nice to see so many lesbians out today?

–8th between 18th & 19th

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