Preacher: What does God think of your sex life? Are you a winner or are you a chicken dinner?
–42nd Street station
Overheard by: Brian Lang
Teen boy: I must be the Antichrist! Every time I pass by a church it blows up. It’s happened twice already!
–30th & 7th
Guy: Why? Because I’m lazy, and I’m Jewish!
–MacDougal Street
Tween swimmer girl #1: I’m nervous. I think I look funny when I’m naked.
Tween swimmer girl #2: No offense, but everyone looks funny when they’re naked!
–Manhattan Plaza Health Club locker room, W. 43rd St.
Overheard by: Andrea
Preteen girl #1, seeing friend take out glasses case: Oh my god, you wear glasses?
Preteen girl #2: Yeah, I have really bad foresight.
–Columbus Cricle
13-year-old girl #1: Oh my god, you totally weren't paying attention to my shoes!
13-year-old girl #2: It's because my cousin is not in town!
–Bus, Coney Island
Overheard by: Brainy
Tween girl: So my sister got this stuff, called absin…abstin… abstinence. It’s this green stuff, and it’s illegal in America, and her friend drank it and thought he saw a clown.
–Bx7 bus
Chubby brown haired tween: Give me another hug!
Pretty blonde tween friend, shouting to a different friend: Melanie!
Chubby brown haired tween: I need another hug!
Pretty blonde tween friend, shouting to a different friend: Melanie!
–John Jay Park, Upper East Side
Overheard by: justwalkinthedog
12-year-old girl: Did you hear what I said about really famous people?
Uninterested mother: No.
12-year-old girl: Well, this will be my first time seeing a really famous person, not just a famous person. Because Full House was important to everyone!
–Mills Theater, before Performance of Bye Bye Birdie
Tween boy with box of candy: Yo, wanna buy a candy bar?
Suit: No, thanks. I’m good.
Tween boy: Well, I’m not, asshole. Buy a goddamn candy bar!
–Columbus Circle
Overheard by: Charlie
Old man at the bar: Everyday that I wake up and see that my name isn’t in the obituaries is a good day.
–Cafe des Artistes Bar
Older woman, to friend: Then we’re going to have to do the suntan lotion thing, and that’s going to be a nightmare.
–Grand Central Station
Overheard by: EthanK
Pre-teen boy, to friend: Yo, man, there’s a lot of old people on this train. I bet they’re all wishing they were our age again. Suckers!
–N Train
Overheard by: Hannah
Old lady, to man playing steel drums as she dances along to the music: Shalom! That was awesome, my man!
–1 Train
Overheard by: Courtney Messer
Elderly woman to elderly friends: So then Andy comes down in his bikini, and of course all the old women go crazy…
–56th & 1st Ave
Old lady looking into fancy cafe: Another shithole!
–74th near Broadway
Overheard by: Harriet Vane
Old lady: Geraldine, do you want to come up later and play… With my wireless router!
–Clark & Herny
Overheard by: Lacy
Two tween girls push into a very crowded train, causing a woman to almost lose her footing.
Woman: You can’t just push if there’s nowhere to go!
The doors start to close.
Tween girl: Obviously I could.
–6 train
Overheard by: Francesca
