Southern woman: Why George, I’m just so proud of yew; I thought yew’d be grossed out by the Blue Man Group.
–Marriott Marquis, Times Square
Overheard by: Beantown Interloper
Southern woman: Why George, I’m just so proud of yew; I thought yew’d be grossed out by the Blue Man Group.
–Marriott Marquis, Times Square
Overheard by: Beantown Interloper
Tween boy: I’m gonna fight you, Steve…I’m gonna trash yo’ face, son…you gonna have to go to Jonathan Zizmor, son.
–6 train
Suit on cell: Hello Dick, this is Woody.
–Four Seasons, E. 57th Street
Receptionist lady: What’s your name?
Little boy: Nayan.
Receptionist lady: Can you spell that for me?
Little boy: N-A-Y-A-N.
Receptionist lady: Did your mommy tell you what your name means?
Little Boy: X-ray vision.
–Doctor’s office, Park Slope
Overheard by: Rachel
Dad on cell: So did they give me a credit?…What? It just says “from the New York Times” and not “from Jesse McKinley of the New York Times“?
–18th Street between 5th & 6th
Guy: Do you think I should have a K at the beginning of my name?
Girl #1: What?
Guy: Well, you know how trendy people have a silent letter in their names sometimes. I think I want to do that. Just put a K at the beginning.
Girl #2: …Then your name would be KShawn.
Girl #1: No one would leave the K silent you idiot. They’d call you “Kuh-Shawn.”
Guy: Why are you laughing?…Oh, is it too ethnic?
–Bowery Ballroom
Girl on cell: Hey, that’s not fair! If you get to be Mr. Incredible, why am I Jewgirl?
–Washington Square Park
Guy on cell: Does anyone in Romania have ice cream?
–Tompkins Square Park
Overheard by: Greg Ashley
Woman: Why is it every time a guy beats his dick over the phone it sounds like a helicopter taking off?
–20th & 6th
Overheard by: phyllis pisacano
Girl: what do you call this style of architecture? Ugly road-houses?
–Mott Haven
Overheard by: yev
Guy: Isn’t England a state of the US, like Colorado?
–Alt.Coffee, Avenue A
Overheard by: dewo
Guy flipping through cell: Damn, why the fuck have I only got White people on here?
–27th & 7th pizzeria
Overheard by: dbrock
Fashion girl: How do you start a zoo? Do you buy the animals first or the place to put them?
–Conde Nast Building, Times Square
Overheard by: Jax
Crazy guy: Are your French Fries made with beef?
–McDonald’s, 85th & 3rd
Overheard by: Marc Cassata
Guy: Is it technically depression if you’re depressed because you can’t date a Gap model?
–Bryant Park
Overheard by: ProcrastYNate
Guy #1: Hi, I’m Bryan.
Guy #2: I’m Brian too!
Guy #1: I’m Bryan with a Y.
Guy #2: I’m Brian with a B.
–Wonderbar, Avenue A
Girl #1: They named their kid Lotus?
Girl #2: That’s kind of cool.
Girl #1: How?
Girl #2: Well, it’s got good connotations, you know? I mean, you’d never meet a bitch named Lotus.
Girl #1: Yeah, but…weren’t they, like, a plague?
–John Fluevog, Mulberry Street
Overheard by: Courtney
Lab coat guy: So, her son’s name is Spike? Who names their kid Spike?
Blue shirt guy: No. His real name is something stupid like Leonard.
–Washington Mutual, 71st & 1st
