Guy #1: Hi, I’m Bryan.
Guy #2: I’m Brian too!
Guy #1: I’m Bryan with a Y.
Guy #2: I’m Brian with a B.
–Wonderbar, Avenue A
Guy #1: Hi, I’m Bryan.
Guy #2: I’m Brian too!
Guy #1: I’m Bryan with a Y.
Guy #2: I’m Brian with a B.
–Wonderbar, Avenue A
Girl #1: They named their kid Lotus?
Girl #2: That’s kind of cool.
Girl #1: How?
Girl #2: Well, it’s got good connotations, you know? I mean, you’d never meet a bitch named Lotus.
Girl #1: Yeah, but…weren’t they, like, a plague?
–John Fluevog, Mulberry Street
Overheard by: Courtney
Lab coat guy: So, her son’s name is Spike? Who names their kid Spike?
Blue shirt guy: No. His real name is something stupid like Leonard.
–Washington Mutual, 71st & 1st
Guy on cell: What’s with all these WASPy names for kids all of a sudden? Don’t people know that Carter and Porter are just tradesman’s names?…Well, Porter is a guy who carries bags, and Carter is a guy who pushes carts…Well, it hardly aspirational, is it?…I mean, I think I’ll name my first-born Cobbler just to stay with the trend.
–53rd & 9th
Guy: Yeah, they had the baby, named her Maybe, and–
Girl: Wait, they named her Maybe? As in M-A-Y-B-E?
Guy: Uh, yeah. Maybe. But I think it might be spelled differently.
Girl: That’s odd, really a weird baby name.
Guy: Yes, yes it is. But it’s sort of like, maybe she’s theirs, maybe she’s not.
–L train
Girl on cell: Wait, you mean John? Like, John John?
–Astor Place
Girl: One of my favorite stories is about my dead friend Kim.
Guy: Oh, I love the dead Kim stories.
–Dos Cominos, Park Ave South
Overheard by: Scott
Duane Reade cashier: Hey! Hey, security! What’s your name?
Duane Reade security: Huh?
Dunae Reade cashier: Your name, fool! What’s your name?
Duane Reade security: Wiggy.
Duane Reade cashier: What?
Duane Reade security: Wiggy. W-I-G-G-Y. That’s not my government name though.
–Duane Reade, Broadway & Canal
Overheard by: K. Thor Jensen
Chick #1: …and I swear my head rammed into the wall and it’s that cheap crappy sheet rock and there’s a hole in it now. I’m gonna tell him to write his name on it!
Chick #2: Oh, he’ll probably like that.
–The Gap, Bensonhurst
Overheard by: Deborah Olin
Queer #1: Oh, jeez, I hooked up with that guy. Don’t look.
Queer #2: Who, the guy who just walked on? Call him over. What’s his name?
Queer #1: What am I, psychic?
–N train, Ditmars Blvd
Overheard by: ant
