Tales From the Dork Continent

Guy: What language is that?
Girl #1: French.
Guy: Where are you girls from?
Girl #1: Morocco.
Guy: Oh, it’s really beautiful there. Really wealthy too, right?
Girl #2: That’s Monaco.

–Elevator, Lexington between 31st & 32nd

Hipster guy: So where are you from originally?
Cabbie: West Africa.
Hipster guy: Oh, really? Where?
Cabbie: Africous.
Hipster guy: Where?
Cabbie: Afri-cous*.
Hipster guy: Wow. I thought I knew all the countries in Africa.
Cabbie: Yes, you know it. It is beautiful.

–Astoria cab

*Ivory Coast through a West African accent.

Overheard by: Martha K, also in the cab

Girl #1: Seriously, don’t ask me to go dancing if we’re not in South America.
Girl #2: Ha, ha. Yeah. What about Europe?
Girl #1: Eh…
Girl #2: Like, Spain.
Girl #1: Yeah, I guess Spain. And maybe Morocco.
Girl #2: Morocco is in Africa.
Girl #1: Pretend like I didn’t just say that.
Girl #2: Now I understand why you dropped out of college!

–1 train

Overheard by: h. goldmine

Posted on July 9, 2026
Astoria, Cabbies, Girls, Global Geography, Guys, Hipsters, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, On the Subway, Street, Stupidity, Subway stations, platforms, etc.

And Go Back to Frisco with Your Pathetic Friends

Girl #1: Do you have a cold or something?
Girl #2: No…It’s my allergies. It’s not like this where I’m from.
Girl #1: Where are you from again?
Girl #2: Arizona.
Girl #1: Oh, pollen and stuff?
Girl #2: No, all these crowds and their germs. It’s not like that out West.

–C train

Overheard by: BBW

Girl: Shoot! I’m sorry.
Guy: So where are you from? Because I know it’s not New York if you say “shoot!”.

–Union Square Regal Cinemas

Overheard by: Jeff Hubbard

Guy on cell: Yeah, yeah, it’s pretty cool out here I guess…you should totally come visit…It’s just…sometimes I feel like New York is just one big Ann Arbor.

–Houston & Suffolk

Overheard by: jesse

Man: We’re not from here. We’re from Pennsylvania, where they’re normal.

–B63 bus

Waiter: How was everything tonight?
Woman: Absolutely wonderful! This was some of the best Mexican food I’ve ever had! And you can take my word for it. I’m from Colorado. We know Mexican food.

–Mexico Lindo, 2nd Avenue

Overheard by: Carol

Posted on June 29, 2026
Girls, Global Geography, Movie Theaters, On the Bus, On the Subway, Union Square and East Village

He Was Distributed All Over the Tarmac

Chick #1: So, that girl from Japan is paying double rent, right? $1600 on her apartment here, and $1800 on the other apartment where she was living. I asked her how she could afford both places and she told me that her Mom and her sister died in a plane crash.
Chick #2: Holy shit! Which plane crash?
Chick #1: I don’t know, one in Japan.
Chick #2: So she’s rich now, right?
Chick #3: That’s how my friend moved to Miami.

–Williamsburg

Posted on June 22, 2026
Death, Friends, Global Geography, Money & Class, Real Estate, Travel, U.S. Geography, Williamsburg

Wednesday One-liners, Eastern Hemisphere

Old guy: Yeah, here today, gone tomorrow. I want to come back as a Polynesian prince.

–Astoria

Overheard by: sara

Posted on June 6, 2026
All Wednesday One-Liners, Astoria, Global Geography, Old People

Ours Also Doesn’t Feature Nazi Footprints

Man: So you went to the Champs Elysee in Paris?
Woman: Yeah, it was cool. Kinda like Madison Avenue, just smaller…

–Frank, 2nd Avenue

Overheard by: Englishman in NY

Posted on April 28, 2026
Compare/Contrast, Global Geography, Idiots, Men, Questions, Restaurants & Cafes, Stupidity, Talking/Convos, Women

It’s Not Aztlan Yet

Chick #1: I called Tasty’s for lunch and the girl on the phone asked me where I was from. I said Southern Africa. The girl said, “I have no idea where that is.” How can you not know Southern Africa? I mean come on…
Chick #2: Where was she from?
Chick #1: I don’t know, some Mexican country.

–55th & 5th

Overheard by: Sarah Federman

Posted on April 17, 2026
Foreigners, Global Geography, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Stupidity

These Boots Are Made for Worshippin’

Queer: Do you know why else I want to move to London? Camdentown. There are lots of punks.
Chick: But wouldn’t there also be a lot of white supremacists?
Queer: I could do white supremacists.
Chick: But aren’t they also homophobic?
Queer: No, just repressed.

–Law office, 50th & 8th