Chick #1: So, that girl from Japan is paying double rent, right? $1600 on her apartment here, and $1800 on the other apartment where she was living. I asked her how she could afford both places and she told me that her Mom and her sister died in a plane crash.
Chick #2: Holy shit! Which plane crash?
Chick #1: I don’t know, one in Japan.
Chick #2: So she’s rich now, right?
Chick #3: That’s how my friend moved to Miami.
–Williamsburg
Old guy: Yeah, here today, gone tomorrow. I want to come back as a Polynesian prince.
–Astoria
Overheard by: sara
Man: So you went to the Champs Elysee in Paris?
Woman: Yeah, it was cool. Kinda like Madison Avenue, just smaller…
–Frank, 2nd Avenue
Overheard by: Englishman in NY
Chick #1: I called Tasty’s for lunch and the girl on the phone asked me where I was from. I said Southern Africa. The girl said, “I have no idea where that is.” How can you not know Southern Africa? I mean come on…
Chick #2: Where was she from?
Chick #1: I don’t know, some Mexican country.
–55th & 5th
Overheard by: Sarah Federman
Queer: Do you know why else I want to move to London? Camdentown. There are lots of punks.
Chick: But wouldn’t there also be a lot of white supremacists?
Queer: I could do white supremacists.
Chick: But aren’t they also homophobic?
Queer: No, just repressed.
–Law office, 50th & 8th
Girl #1: What do you mean, there’s an Indian Ocean?
Girl #2: Of course there’s an Indian Ocean.
Girl #1: Where is it?
–Bryant Park
Guy #1: You Indian? India is like the next superpower, dude.
Guy #2: Superpower my ass.
–87th & Lexington
Hobo: Where you from?
Girl: Russia.
Hobo: Russia? Oh. I like Russia. Jesus will get you a good job.
–E train
Suit on cell: Hey, guess where I am?…Guess…I’m in Glasgow!
–Carmine & Bleecker
Overheard by: Chris Cotterman
Preppy guy: How am I racist? I’m Irish! I can’t be racist!
–9th Street & 3rd Avenue
Overheard by: Miss Hipstah
Woman on cell: My daughter went to Montreal. I was like, “Why do you have to go where the French go? Why couldn’t you just go to Ontario?”
–55th & 3rd
Bag lady: Can I have a quarter? The Irish have taken over the YMCA.
–22nd & 5th
Overheard by: smanikas
Thug: Paisano?…It’s like “my nigga” but in Italian.
–Times Square
Overheard by: KRUD
HS Girl #1: I’ve never heard of Latvia.
HS Girl #2: I’ve heard of it; I just don’t think it’s a real place.
–Carroll Gardens
Overheard by: andersonsmitty
