Girl #1: I’m tired of these ghetto dudes out here.
Girl #2: I know das right.
Girl #1: Das why I need a nigga in a business suit. I’m tired of
these ghetto dudes out here with they pants hangin’ off they butt, comin’ home 3 in the mornin’ talkin’ ’bout, “Boo, make me a peanut butter and jelly sanwich.” If I had a nigga in a business suit, he’ll get a project girl like me out da hood and make me a 3 course meal!
–3 train
Girl #1: What do you mean? What are pajama bottoms?
Girl #2: You know, like those cotton pants you buy at Old Navy.
Girl #1: I don’t know what you’re talking about but I have 3 pair.
–University & 12th
Guy: I was just so freakin’ relieved about finishing the report I started doing a little dance.
Girl: Were you naked?
–Union Square
Girl: Oh my God! I meant to tell you!
Guy: What?
Girl: Yesterday I was walking on 5th Avenue and this horde of middle-aged women stopped me to ask where I got my Ralph Lauren shirt.
Guy: No way!
Girl: It was great.
Guy: The one with the big horse on it?
Girl: It’s a pony, not a horse!
Guy: What’s the difference?
Girl: It’s different.
Guy: Can you explain the difference?
Girl: No.
–Rockefeller Center
Overheard by: pixelvisions
Little boy #1: If they lost my bag, it would be so cool!
Little boy #2: Um…no it wouldn’t.
Little boy #1: Yeah, it would! I would sue them. Do you know how many dress up clothes I had in that bag?
–JFK
Overheard by: La Machine
Chick #1: A black thong with that skirt, what is she thinking? It’s totally see-through!
Chick #2: Yeah, but who’d want to look?
Chick #1: Oh my god, we are such hateful bitches!
Chick #2: I know!
–15th & 5th
White girl #1: You know that guy in the purple shirt we were talking to on the train? I think I know him.
White girl #2: Wait, you mean the guy in the black shirt?
White girl #1: No, his shirt was purple…the black guy, y’know?
WHite girl #2: I really think his shirt was black…
White girl #1: Sweetie, that was his face.
–168th Street station
Overheard by: Cheese Monkey
Girl #1: I’m hungry.
Girl #2: Sorry, I don’t got anything. No wait, I have melon that I brought.
Girl #1: You have what in your bra?
–120th & Riverside Drive
Guy on cell: Yeah, I’m wearing ahhh…a football jersey and Speedos.
–Houston & Allen
Overheard by: M!J
Queer on cell: Wear tights…No, you don’t pad it! You just push it up so it looks like a big baked potato, like what dancers do. Just hike it up to the sky!…The bits and the pieces. It’s not very comfortable, but it gives a good visual effect of…mass…What? Pointy? Ew, no! Pointy’s bad! Yich, pointy is such a turnoff.
–Union Square
Overheard by: Michele
