Guy #1: …So I say to him, “For the last time, give me back my robocock!”, ya know? He still has my robocock.
Guy #2: How long has he had it?
Guy #1: See, that’s not the point. He’s a bastard in retro clothing.
–7th & Bleecker
Overheard by: Deadboy
Guy #1: …So I say to him, “For the last time, give me back my robocock!”, ya know? He still has my robocock.
Guy #2: How long has he had it?
Guy #1: See, that’s not the point. He’s a bastard in retro clothing.
–7th & Bleecker
Overheard by: Deadboy
Chick: I swear to god, I don’t know how nothing has happened to me yet, either I am infertile or the cure for herpes is in my vagina.
–6 train
Overheard by: brynn
Man on cell: Hey, baby. It’s sure hot out today…you better get out those hot pants…I mean hot shorts…your pussy must be burning up.
–56th & Broadway
Businesswoman on cell: Aw, man. If only she were a hermaphrodite! Damn!
–7th & Perry
Korean dude: Are you suggesting that you have a super dope vagina?
–Camel, W. 33rd Street
Overheard by: Dave Min
Man: We’re going to have a tampon fondue!
–Duane Reade, Bay Ridge
Overheard by: molina1230
Woman: Excuse me, I left my passport in the ladies’ room.
Stewardess guy: I’m sorry, madam, you’ll have to wait until we make our way down the aisle.
Woman: But I need to get my passport.
Stewardess guy: I understand that, but we cannot move this cart back far enough. We should be through in a few minutes.
Woman: But it’s in the bathroom! What if someone takes it?
Stewardess guy: If it’s not in the bathroom when you get there, let one of us know and we’ll make an announcement.
Woman: No, I can’t wait for that to happen, I have to go and get my passport now.
Stewardess guy: I understand, but as I’ve explained to you before, you must wait. Please return to your seat.
Woman: Oh, you’re very nice. You know, in the United States, people don’t behave like that.
Stewardess guy: In the Netherlands people don’t dress like that.
–KLM flight to JFK
Woman: I would bedazzle the shit out of that shirt.
–53rd & 9th
Girl: So, he said he was thinking about getting LASIK, and I told him that if he wants to have surgery he has to start with a nosejob.
–Times Square
Man on cell: Yeah man, I promised for her birthday I’d take her to the best doctor in town. She really needs to have this done. Where did you take yours when she had fleas?
–57th & Broadway
Girl on cell: Oh, I don’t know, the last time I saw you your lips didn’t look that overinflated.
–Washington Square dog run
Overheard by: boswell
Girl #1: …uh, strapless?
Girl #2: Yeah? Which one?
Girl #1: You know you just asked me what strap on I bought, right?
Girl #2: Oh, shit. I’m not very smart am I?
–Victoria’s Secret, Prince Street
Overheard by: Natalie
Girl #1: What if you were so obsessed with Rent that you carried the CD around everywhere?
Girl #2: That’s actually kinda cool.
Girl #1: And wore a cloak?
–Irving Plaza
Woman #1: That skirt was terrible. I looked like I just got off the boat!
Woman #2: What boat?
Woman #1: …The boat from Ireland.
–Macy’s
Girl #1: …so I like tried it last night, and it wasn’t that bad and all…not like great, but not too gross or whatever. But then he like, wanted to jackoff on my Pop-Tart today, and I was like, “Yuck, get out!”
Girl #2: Do you think these sneakers are geeky?
–Battery Park
Lanky guy: I really don’t like these new jeans you got me. They’re way too tight in the waist and legs, but baggy in the butt, and at least two inches too short. Plus they’re boot cut, and I don’t wear any boots!
Girl: Those are my jeans.
Lanky guy: Oh. Well, that would explain the lack of room in the crotch, then.
–64th & Lexington
Overheard by: Adria
Girl #1: These are my fat ass pants.
Girl #2: Oh…so are they supposed to make your ass look fat or thin?
–58th & 5th
