Woman: Nigga, where you goin’?
Boy: Mom, action figures!
Woman: Nigga, the action figures is right here!
–Toys R’ Us, Times Square
Woman: Nigga, where you goin’?
Boy: Mom, action figures!
Woman: Nigga, the action figures is right here!
–Toys R’ Us, Times Square
A girl and guy are making out on the street.
Guy: I gotta go.
Girl: Wait, come back.
Guy: I’m busy.
Girl: What’s your name?
Guy: Bill.
Girl: How can I get in touch with you?
Guy: Google it.
–11th Street & 3rd Avenue
Overheard by: Tibbie X
Teen girl #1: Oh my gosh, Brad Pitt is such an idiot.
Teen girl #2: I know, he never should’ve left Jen.
Teen girl #1: No, I mean, can’t he see that the baby is clearly not his?
–Penn Station newsstand
Newspaper guy: Only in the Post! Pictures of Pataki crying like a pussy!
–34th & 7th
Old Jewess: That Suzanne Somers has some nerve. She is writing another diet book. I have a friend who has read all her diet books and every year she gets fatter and fatter.
–Music Box theatre, West 45th Street
Fratboy: She was like an ugly Paris Hilton, but not rich.
–C train
Overheard by: nicolette
Guy: I’m gonna beat you like an Olsen twin.
–68th & Columbus
Overheard by: Andrew Zar
Teen boy: Yo, I heard that Tupac was named after a Jewish holiday.
–Red Hook
Guy: Yeah, you know, that’s the great thing about the Kennedys: they get $1 off of every bottle of Scotch that they buy. You know, because their dad was a bootlegger and all.
–52 & Lexington
FishBowlNY chick: Not only do you blog about everything, you blog in five different blogs about everything.
–Slainte, The Bowery
Hipster guy: Everyone keeps asking me why I’m sad, and I’m like, “I’m not sad, I’m from New York.”
–St. Mark’s between 1st & A
Overheard by: Danny G.
Woman: I have some friends, and they lived in Brooklyn all they lives, and they ain’t ever been to Kings Plaza Shopping Mall. They so limited!
–5 train
Tourist woman: Excuse me, can you tell me where the big apple is?
–43rd & Broadway
Overheard by: katie cunningham
Woman: What I love most about New York is that wherever you go, in every neighborhood, there’s garbage on the curb. To me, that’s democracy.
–University & 11th
Lady: You never see girls wearing shorts in New York City unless they’re tourists.
–57th & Broadway
Guy on cell: Well I’m sorry, Princess, if New York doesn’t smell like a bed of roses!
–Church & Worth
Overheard by: Becka Dash
NY Post guy: This boat is bootlegged! It won’t turn left!
–Penn Station
NY Post guy: Read all about it! Discovery shuttle is a bootleg…doesn’t work…can’t turn left. Read all about it!
–Penn Station
Overheard (correctly) by: Toon
Little girl: But I’m not on line for Harry Potter; I want to go to the bathroom!
–Barnes & Noble, Astor Place
Guy #1: Hey, would you like a free cd?
Guy #2: Eh…
Guy #1: Do you like Led Zeppelin and Monty Python’s Flying Cir–
Guy #2: Oh hellll no.
–Williamsburg
Old Black guy: The thing about Girls Gone Wild is that most of them are strippers. Girls don’t really go wild.
–D train
Overheard by: pixelvisions
Woman: One day they have Angelina sleeping with Tom Cruise, now they say she’s with Brad.
–Food Emporium, Broadway & 68th
Hipster chick: You know, they have all these sodas with added lime flavor, but why don’t they ever do Sprite with lime?
–14th & 7th
Overheard by: Melissa
Huge guy: So he comes up to me and gives me the $600 that he owes me. I took one look at the bills and thought this was the worst counterfeit job I’ve ever seen so I beat the shit out of him…Did you know they have a new $100 bill?
–35th & 8th
Overheard by: Paul Ferris
Woman: Sometimes I see underwear I don’t even understand.
–Victoria’s Secret, 82nd & Broadway
Overheard by: djlindee
Pre-school teacher lady: If they didn’t build the subway, we wouldn’t have Home Depot or Lowe’s.
–NY Transit Museum
Overheard by: Trix
Mom: I don’t know where you learned a word like that! Where would you hear that? That’s a bad name. We don’t call people that. I just don’t understand where you would have picked that up. Maybe from Howard Stern.
–2 train
