Black guy #1: I got all depressed after I lost my hair.
Black guy #2: You what?
Black guy #1: My hair; I got depressed when I lost it.
Black guy #2: I didn’t know you had a ferret!
Black guy #1: Shit yeah, but halfway through I decided to shave it.
Black guy #2: You shaved a fucking ferret? What the hell you do that for, nigga?
Black guy #1: I just hated losing it, so I shaved it.
Black guy #2: Man, I’m fucked up.
Black guy #1: Me too.
–Union Square Regal Cinemas men’s room
Pre-JAP: Oh, and? At the party, we’re making schmores.
Jewish mom: S’mores.
Pre-JAP: That’s what I said. Schmores.
–Loews, 42nd Street
Overheard by: Heather Hunter
Woman: Oh, I wanted a large popcorn. I thought you said this size was the biggest?
Movie guy: It is.
Woman: What about the bucket over there? It looks bigger.
Movie guy: It is.
Woman: Well, if this is the large, what’s the bucket?
–City Cinemas, E. 86th Street
Overheard by: JDH
Hispanic mom: How much is the popcorn?
Concession Stand guy: Well the medium is $5 and the large is $5.50.
Hispanic mom: What’s the difference? Is the large just bigger?
–Loews Lincoln Square, 68th Street
Overheard by: ~dana
Man #1: He’s put on some weight. I don’t remember him being that fat in The Last Five Years.
Man #2: Well, having two kids’ll do that to you.
–Imperial Theatre, West 45th Street
Chick #1: I need to buy some coke for the house after this…Coca-Cola.
Chick #2: Oh! You need to clarify these things. I was picturing a big
jar of cocaine in your living room or something.
Chick #1: That would be the hottest thing ever! I keep saying these absurd things hoping someone will put it in Overheard in New York.
–Loews Theater, 86th & Lexington
Before a movie, a man gets up and jumps off a balcony. His friend remains seated.
Fellow movie patron: Did he just die?
Friend: Nah, nah it’s cool. He’s a French wall-jumper.
–Union Square Regal Cinemas
Guy #1: It was artsy, girls don’t like that.
Guy #2: How is it artsy? He ripped off a guy’s nuts!
–Loews 34th St. men’s room
Overheard by: Dan Dickinson
Dude: I thought it was great. Very visually arresting. I liked how they stayed true to the visual style of the comic book. Of course I say that having never read the comic book.
–Regal Cinemas Union Square
Overheard by: Greg Rutter
Old lady: What’s going on here?
Woman on line: They’re premiering a new film by Todd Solondz
Old lady: Yeah, but what’s it about?
Woman on line: It’s a pretty dark, sadistic movie.
Old lady: What’s it about? Did you not understand me the first time?
Woman on line: I haven’t seen it yet so I don’t know!
Old lady: Jesus. Standing on line for god knows how long and you don’t know a damn thing about what you’re there for!
–outside Chelsea Cinemas, W. 23rd Street
Overheard by: Abbie Mullaney
Dude: I was assuming this isn’t a date, but do you want me to buy your ticket anyway?
Chick: Oh, well I was assuming this was a date so I didn’t bring any money with me!
Dude: Okay, well I’ll just go ahead and buy this second one then.
–Regal Union Square Cinemas
Overheard by: Greg Rutter
