Guy: Can you get your backpack out of my back?
Boy: There’s nowhere to put it.
Guy: Why don’t you put it in your ass?
–M86 bus
Guy: Can you get your backpack out of my back?
Boy: There’s nowhere to put it.
Guy: Why don’t you put it in your ass?
–M86 bus
Girl #1: Do you have a cold or something?
Girl #2: No…It’s my allergies. It’s not like this where I’m from.
Girl #1: Where are you from again?
Girl #2: Arizona.
Girl #1: Oh, pollen and stuff?
Girl #2: No, all these crowds and their germs. It’s not like that out West.
–C train
Overheard by: BBW
Girl: Shoot! I’m sorry.
Guy: So where are you from? Because I know it’s not New York if you say “shoot!”.
–Union Square Regal Cinemas
Overheard by: Jeff Hubbard
Guy on cell: Yeah, yeah, it’s pretty cool out here I guess…you should totally come visit…It’s just…sometimes I feel like New York is just one big Ann Arbor.
–Houston & Suffolk
Overheard by: jesse
Man: We’re not from here. We’re from Pennsylvania, where they’re normal.
–B63 bus
Waiter: How was everything tonight?
Woman: Absolutely wonderful! This was some of the best Mexican food I’ve ever had! And you can take my word for it. I’m from Colorado. We know Mexican food.
–Mexico Lindo, 2nd Avenue
Overheard by: Carol
American girl: Do you know who I think wants my brother’s friends?
Polish girl: Who is a twat?
American girl: No. Do you know who wants my brother’s friends?
Polish girl: Oh. Great.
–B61 bus
Teen girl #1: What’s the body of water we’re crossing?
Teen girl #2: I think it’s the Long Island Sound.
–X1 bus, Verrazano Bridge
Homeboy #1: Yeah, ever since he got that raise, he been livin’ all grand and shit.
Homeboy #2: Oh yeah?
Homeboy #1: Yeah, yo! Nigga got 3-ply toilet paper an’ shit!
–Q46 bus
Overheard by: Joyce Shen
A crazy man takes out a whole frozen fish from his bag and bangs it on the side of the bus repeatedly.
Crazy man #2: You should pretend that’s the mayor.
–M23 bus
Overheard by: Erika Strum
Boy: Hey Grandma, do you have a map?
Grandma: No, not on me. A map of what?
Boy: Your eyes.
Grandma: My eyes? Why do you want a map of my eyes?
Boy: ’cause I keep getting lost in them.
–M23 bus
Overheard by: jessie
Teen boy #1: He has 3 taps in his shower. One cold water, another hot, and one for mustard.
Teen boy #2: I like mustard.
Teen boy #1: In the shower?
–Q43 bus
Overheard by: Sucka MC
Boy #1: Ha, ha, ha, ha! What did the shoe say to the foot? How’s it footin’?
Boy #2: Ha, ha, ha, ha! What did the bus say to the street? How’s it streetin’?
Boy #1: Ha, ha, ha, ha! What did the airplane say to the building?
Boy #2: Ha, ha, ha, ha!
Boy #1: Hello, I’m gonna crash into you now.
–M60 bus
Overheard by: marisa
Guy #1: Yeah man, she was all over me at that bar!
Guy #2: For real? Why?
Guy #1: She was either skanked out on E or freaked out on skank.
–B61 bus
Overheard by: mfs
