Black guy: Man, nigga, you’re really dirty. I mean, you’re a slob, nigga. You’re…you’re a fucking Mexican.
–Union Square
Black guy: Man, nigga, you’re really dirty. I mean, you’re a slob, nigga. You’re…you’re a fucking Mexican.
–Union Square
Black cyclist guy: Where’s all the black people around here? Did y’all eat all the black people?
White girl: They taste yummy!
–Houston & West Broadway
Overheard by: alyssa
White guy: God! This is taking forever!
Black guy: Hey man, you don’t like it then go back to Omaha or Ohio or whatever square state you’re from.
White guy: But I’m from Brooklyn.
Black guy: Then act like it!
–Whitehall SI Ferry terminal
Black guy #1: I got all depressed after I lost my hair.
Black guy #2: You what?
Black guy #1: My hair; I got depressed when I lost it.
Black guy #2: I didn’t know you had a ferret!
Black guy #1: Shit yeah, but halfway through I decided to shave it.
Black guy #2: You shaved a fucking ferret? What the hell you do that for, nigga?
Black guy #1: I just hated losing it, so I shaved it.
Black guy #2: Man, I’m fucked up.
Black guy #1: Me too.
–Union Square Regal Cinemas men’s room
White girl: That’s terrible! The only thing I want my kids to be that I’m not is half-black.
–Columbia University
A black guy with a boom box comes on the train.
Boom box guy: This next song is for everyone who don’t feel good about himself when he get up in the morning. You gotta know that everyone is beautiful in they own right, and when you get up you gotta feel smoove.
He starts playing a song on the boom box and sings along. He and his three friends bop their heads to the beat and try to get other passengers to sing too. Then the conductor begins to makes an announcement. Boom box guy lowers the music.
Boom box guy: Everyone best be listening to what the man has to tell us.
–6 train
Girl: Excuse me. Excuse me.
Man: No.
–Whitehall SI Ferry terminal
Black guy: Three-quarters of that thing was up his ass. That nigga was fucked up for life. Mentally, physically…
–Lexington & 53rd
Black guy: Yo, can I get a dollar for a hot dog?
White guy: Sorry. This is my last fiver.
White woman: Here ya go.
Black guy: That’ll do.
White woman: You could at least say thank you.
Black guy: I did. I was speaking ebonics.
–Gray’s Papaya, 8th Avenue
Overheard by: CRE
Two guys and a girl are walking down a street when a strange man sitting in an office chair rolls toward them.
Chair guy: Ah, this girl got two boyfriends! Mmm…Can a black man join the club? Can…a black man….join the club. Join the club.
–4th & Jane
Overheard by: marissa
Guy #1: So she fine?
Guy #2: Yeah, man, and get this, dog: she’s got full benefits!
Guy #1: Yo man, you better marry that shit!
–Elevator, 42nd & Madison
Overheard by: Manny M
Girl #1: So $120 of antibiotics later, my cat should be just fine.
Girl #2: Doesn’t your cat have health insurance?
Girl #1: Yes, but it doesn’t cover prescription drugs.
Girl #2: Do they offer that type of coverage?
Girl #1: If anyone’s getting an optional rider prescription drug plan in my apartment, it’s going to be me.
–Inwood
Overheard by: Melissa Mink
