Hippie guy: Hey. How’s it going?
Dwarf guy: Hey.
Hippie guy: Remember me? We were at band camp together.
–F train
Overheard by: Gretchen S
Hippie guy: Hey. How’s it going?
Dwarf guy: Hey.
Hippie guy: Remember me? We were at band camp together.
–F train
Overheard by: Gretchen S
Queer #1: We are going to the Kelly Clarkson concert in two weeks, you should come.
Queer #2: I have to go home that weekend. They are having a memorial for my grandpa who died. Maybe I can get out of it.
Queer #1: Seriously. I mean people die all the time, but Kelly Clarkson only comes to New York like twice a year.
–Splash, W. 17th Street
Queer: When did this song come out?
DJ: I was in diapers.
Queer: That’s hot!
DJ: You think?
Queer: I won’t date guys in their thirties anymore. They’re so conservative.
DJ: Uh-huh.
Queer: I wanna be your daddy!
DJ: Put it on paper.
–Barrage, W. 47th Street
Overheard by: Nick Salvato
Girl: So, Britney Spears said that her mother told her that, like, childbirth is like the most excruciating pain ever.
Guy: Well, look what she ended up with. If my child was a slutbag whore, I’d be in pain too.
–Hudson & Vandam
Yarmulke guy: You play the guitar?
Blue collar guy: Yeah, but not Havah Nagila or anything.
–3 train
A black guy with a boom box comes on the train.
Boom box guy: This next song is for everyone who don’t feel good about himself when he get up in the morning. You gotta know that everyone is beautiful in they own right, and when you get up you gotta feel smoove.
He starts playing a song on the boom box and sings along. He and his three friends bop their heads to the beat and try to get other passengers to sing too. Then the conductor begins to makes an announcement. Boom box guy lowers the music.
Boom box guy: Everyone best be listening to what the man has to tell us.
–6 train
Girl: Excuse me. Excuse me.
Man: No.
–Whitehall SI Ferry terminal
Girl: Who’s playing tonight?
Guy: Coheed and Cambria.
Girl: Oh man, I shouldn’t have done all that acid.
–15th & Irving
Guy #1: I’ll do it, but they’ve got to remember that Sunday is the least rock ‘n roll day of the week.
Guy #2: Yeah…
Guy #1: Jeez…I’m not like those guys, hangin’ out with their wives and kids and shit. What do they know about playing? I need to play.
Guy #2: Why don’t you try to break up their families? Ruin their marriages or some shit.
–6 train
Overheard by: Spiros Harlequinn
Bouncing Souls guy: Hey, I’d really like to meet Debbie Harry! Debbie, if you can hear this–
Chick: As do we all want to meet Debbie!
–Save CBGBs, Washington Square Park
Overheard by: liz goldstein
Hipster chick: You like the Killers? Of all the British bands–
Hipster boy: I think they’re from Vegas, actually.
Hipster chick: Well, I just assumed they’re British because they suck.
–L train
