Hippie guy: Hey. How’s it going?
Dwarf guy: Hey.
Hippie guy: Remember me? We were at band camp together.
–F train
Overheard by: Gretchen S
Hippie guy: Hey. How’s it going?
Dwarf guy: Hey.
Hippie guy: Remember me? We were at band camp together.
–F train
Overheard by: Gretchen S
Hippie guy on cell: Nathan, I don’t care how drunk you were, if you’re giving a blowjob, you know you’re giving a blowjob.
–Park Slope
Overheard by: Mr. Donutsu
Dude #1: Man it’s all about being tantric.
Dude #2: Yeah? Are you tantric?
Dude #1: Well, sorta.
–F train
Overheard by: Athena
Hippie boy: What are we going to talk about? He’s a hairdresser and I’m a teenager!
Mom: Date him, I guess.
–Prospect Park
Overheard by: Gretchen
Hippie: They gave Israel a nuclear submarine.
Companion: So they can fish?
–5th Ave. & 21st St.
Overheard by: MK and AT
Hippiechick: You can’t hug your child with nuclear arms.
–F Train
Overheard by: Erica Bergin
Guy: …it’s like…you can’t hug your child with nuclear arms!
–Bubba Gump’s, Times Square
Hippie to doorman: I know this is a weird question, but is there an office in this building called “Planet Hemp”?
Doorman: Nah man, sorry. (under his breath, as hippie turns and walks away) I fucking wish there was.
–23rd & Park Ave
Overheard by: Wanna get High?
Woman on cell: Well what did you expect? Did you think you could just go into the subway and get a million bucks playing your guitar?
–Union Square
Overheard by: Domi
Aged hippie: Would you rather have a housewife on Prozac or a babysitter on acid? [Friend shrugs.] Well, I’d rather have a babysitter on acid!
–Central Park
Overheard by: MRA
Bimbette daughter: So, you like, had to, like, grow corn and shit when you were little?
Old hippie father: Yeah, before I moved to Oregon. We had cows.
Bimbette daughter: Ewww! You had to milk cows?
Old hippie father: Yeah, but cows don’t help with household chores, though. Only crocodiles can do that.
Bimbette daughter: Word.
–Barnes & Noble
