Girl on phone: I forget what the BD stands for, but I’m pretty sure the SM stand for sado-masochism. My ad was in the platonic section, anyway.

–60th & Columbus

Overheard by: Alaska

Girl #1: Michael Jackson is dead? Really?
Girl #2: Yeah, we read it on TMZ. They're usually pretty good about knowing when people are dead.

–The Mill

Girl: Did you hear about that new dog they’re breeding? It’s called
a pewgle.
Guy: What kinda dog is that?
Girl: Oh, it’s a pug and um…um…a bugle.

–Deli, 53rd & 6th

Overheard by: Janelle F

Guy #1: Dude, did you hear that Arnold Schwarzenegger died in a car crash?
Guy #2: No way! That’s not true, is it?
Guy #1: I dunno. I am asking you.

–F train

Overheard by: Alex Wipf

Queer eye: Lindsay Lohan wore this dress on the cover of Teen Vogue; ever since then, it’s been like…crack cocaine.

–Marc Jacobs, Bleecker Street

Overheard by: Mat Triebner

Dude: Hey, these papers are free, right?
Checkout Guy: No, they’re 50 cents.
Dude: But it’s Saturday.
Checkout Guy: Right. And it’s still 50 cents.
Dude: Aw, c’mon man! The Pope is dying!

–Food Emporium, 12th & 6th

Overheard by: MLR

Hipster boy to girl: After the internet age and the digital age, we are now entering the cyborg age.
Hipster girl to boy: Yeah, cyborgs are totally mainstream now. I saw a special on Fox News all about cyborgs and it was totally mainstream.
Hipster boy to girl: My brother has an insulin pump.

–F Train Platform

Overheard by: sadie

Guy #1: Dude, did you hear? Another helicopter crashed into the East River.
Guy #2: Man, that would suck. The East River is just dirty and nasty.
Guy #1: Shit yeah. It’s full of floatin’ helicopters.

–2 train

Announcer dude: People, get the Audio Guide! If you don’t you’ll end up up there thinking, ‘I should have listened to that handsome, well-spoken man downstairs.’ You’ll be beating yourself for not buying the Audio Guide. And I don’t need that on my conscience.

–Empire State Building

Overheard by: George Carstocea

Daily News hawker: Sign up here for your free subscription to the Daily News! [Muttering] We’ll screw you later.

–Outside Shea Stadium

Overheard by: Mrs. Met

Guy selling comedy show tickets: Come on, have a ticket. If you don’t I’ll stalk you on your MySpace page!

–Times Square

Overheard by: Punkgrrl

Top of the Rock promoter guy: Yeah, it’s supposed to be, like, the best view or whatever of, uh, I don’t know… [Calls to fellow promoter] Yo, man, you ever been up there?

–Rockefeller Center

Flyer dude: See the naked cowboy on stage! Sucking cock!

–46th & Broadway

Overheard by: Ashley

Guy selling newspapers: New York Post here! Daily News here! [He’s ignored.] New York Post here! Daily News! [Still ignored.] George Bush wins the lottery! [Still ignored.]

–33rd & 7th

Comedy club promoter: People, you gotta come tonight, because if you don’t my boss is gonna kill me! I work for the mafia!

–Times Square

[On Ash Wednesday]Female pastor: Come get ashy for Jesus, no credit, bad credit, God don’t care. Come get your blessing! Free Jesus with all ash.
Daily newspaper hawker: Daily News, 50 cents, Jesus for free!

–Fordham Rd & Jerome Ave