Scents of the City

Girl #1: My apartment smells like balls.
Girl #2: That’s nothing. I think my neighbor is sniffing my panties in the laundry room. 

–28th & Park

Overheard by: Stephanie 

Woman: I’ve figured out what’s wrong with him!
Man: What?
Woman: He smells like ear wax.

–Financial District

Overheard by: p

A homeless guy is sleeping 

Other dude: You smell like you want to be alone.

–A train

Conductor: Vomiting is prohibited on this train. Please, no vomiting on this train.


Conductor: There are only three reasons for an empty train car. A) it smells. B) it’s hot. C) someone threw up.

–1 Train

Overheard by: Laura

Gay NYU student: I’ve already been through the cycle. Eat, vom, feel better about life.

–Tisch Hall, NYU

Conductor: There will be no vomiting on this train. Repeat. There will be no vomiting on this train. (short pause) If you have to vomit, vomit on yourself.

–LIRR, Drunk Train

Overheard by: Jason

Girl to two guy friends: Last night I was traveling back on the train, and there was, like, an airsick bag in the thing and I got a craving for Gardetto’s, because the last time we were traveling… (becomes inaudible)

–Atlantic & Bond, Boerum Hill

Overheard by: Rich Mintz

Boyfriend to wasted girlfriend: Baby, I swear. This is the best place in New York to throw up. (girlfriend pukes)

–MacDougal St, The Village

Overheard by: Reid Rogers

Girl #1: So, Matt* is back with Della*.
Queer: Even though her vagina smells funny?
Girl #2: I need to pee, y’all.

–1 train

Overheard by: Dan

Frat boy #1: She smelled like… You know that smell, when you eat asparagus, and then take a piss.
Frat boy #2: No, wait, I kinda like that smell.

–10th & 1st

Overheard by: Katie

Guy: Wow, I just realized something. Smell that. Manhattan really smells like Froot Loops.
Girl: Really? [She sniffs.]Guy: Yeah. Damn, I gotta lay off the Froot Loops.
Girl: No, Mike, you gotta lay off the pot.

–8th & West 55th

Overheard by: Roger

Chick: What’s that smell?
Guy: Either someone farted or it’s terrorism.

–42nd & Broadway

Hot girl #1: It’s the guy on the end of the train.
Hot girl #2: Wow. It’s amazing the human body can smell like that and still be alive.

–Coney Island‐bound F train

Woman #1: Oooh, I really like the smell of whatever you’re eating or wearing. What is that?
Woman #2: A cough drop.
Woman #1: What kind?
Woman #2: Hall’s.
Woman #1: Oooh, that’s really nice.

–Elevator, McCann Erickson office