Hobo: Spare some change?
Lady suit: No.
Hobo: Fine. Well, at least it's sunny out today.
Lady suit: Yeah, it's so nice. But I only get to stare at it from inside the office. (looks sad)
Hobo: I feel for ya.


Overheard by: Caesara

40-something suit to another: I should go see Santa, but I'm a couple decades too late. (pause) And if you go without a kid, they think you're weird or something.

LIRR Train Station
New York

Overheard by: BK

Suit: You are so good at stalking.
20-ish chick: Thank you so much! [Shakes his hand.]Suit: Keep up the good work.

Dupont Circle
Washington, DC

Overheard by: Steve

Angry suit on phone: Listen, I don't care what you think, if you don't think I'm doing a good job, don't fucking ask me to work for you! (pause) No! No! No! I don't care, I'm doing more important things right now! (pause) I'm buying plant food!


Overheard by: Guy

Hot young suit #1: What happened with your girlfriend?
Hot young suit #2: I manipulated her into a false sense of security, then rooted her, then dumped her — same as I did with Mandy. [After a pause] I’m not looking for praise.


Overheard by: Rosebyanothername

40-something female suit to friends: I just wanted to cover her in Lysol!

San Jose, California

Overheard by: Wondering what the rest of the conversation was…

Suit on cell: But yeah, concrete is the future.

Metairie Road
Metairie, Louisiana

Overheard by: What happened to plastic?

Conductor: Everybody please be patient, we have an obstruction on the tracks. Police are working to clear it, we will continue as soon as they finish.
Young suit: We're in a 55-ton battering ram, why did we even stop?

MAX Rail
Portland, Oregon

Overheard by: Ram Das

50-something suit at brunch: The South was a backwards place until air conditioning. That's what allowed them to advance as a people. Now, these hurricanes come and knock out their power. That's why they have so many problems during these storms.

Overheard by: didn't know ac saved south

Scientologist: Excuse me, sir. Would you like a free personality test from the Church of Scientology?
Suit: I don’t need one. My wife says I’m an asshole.

Outside Church of Scientology, Yonge Street

Overheard by: lauren mcgoldrick