Chick #1: Have you ever had a class with him?
Chick #2: Yeah.
Chick #1: Does he really cry in class?
Chick #2: Sometimes.
Chick #1: … Cool.

http://www.overheardinminneapolis.com/2007/04/most_teachers_wait_until_they.html

Overheard by: wishing he was my prof

Woman #1, to table of friends: Well, I’m getting old, too. I’m getting wrinkles.
Woman #2: The thing is, you’re so fucking ugly that no one notices when you get old.

http://overheardinthevalley.blogspot.com/2007/03/well-id-rather-be-ugly-on-outside.html

Overheard by: Me.

Woman pointing at cadaver: Oooh. I’d love one of those for home!

http://eavesdropdc.blogspot.com/2007/07/i-see-and-crave-dead-people.html

Young suit: I need to get a new BlackBerry. I dropped my old one in a urinal. Well, I was wearing lederhosen, and they don’t have pockets.

San Jose Airport
California

Overheard by: Keren

Mom to screaming toddlers: No! You are the noisiest humans I’ve ever seen!

Staples
Franklin, Tennessee

Old hag: Sometimes I forget I’m married. I guess if my husband was rich I wouldn’t forget about him, but he not.

http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/2007/03/no-wonder-he-is-fucking-your-friend.html

Overheard by: anonymous

Teen girl: I just discovered my fly was undone when my hand was mysteriously near my crotch.

Subway restaurant
New Zealand

Professor: I don’t care what you say, there’s nothing worse than eating a baby.

Community college
North Carolina

Overheard by: First row fanboy

Man to friend: Let’s play the handicapped game — paralyzed, or just lazy?

Epcot Park, Disney World
Orlando, Florida

Mom reading book: This says ‘odd.’ Do you know what ‘odd’ means? It means something is funny or weird. Like when you said you wanted to eat a rock — that was odd.

Red Line train
Washington, DC

Overheard by: Sitting behind them trying not to laugh