Newly-Single Wednesday One-Liners

Blonde on cell: I'm sorry, you don't get to have two divorces and then dump my totally awesome friend, twice. And still have me think you're a good guy. (pause) Oh, and be forty years old.

–56th St & 2nd Ave

Overheard by: Vanessa

Man on cell: I'll feel better once I move out of that place. She can keep it, I don't even care. That shit is a haunted place.

–Frederick Douglass Houses

Drunk guy: Every time I would break up with her she would be like "I'm going to kill myself." Eventually I was just like "Prove it!"

–Bulldog Bar

Woman on cell: You can divorce me anytime you want; you're the one paying for it.

–Financial District