Woman at the bar to bartender: Who would pee in the bathtub and put it in their mouth?
–Brooklyn
Guitar-playing subway performer/hobo to teen, during fight: I piss more in beer in a week than you make in money.
–G Train
Man on phone, standing three feet away from three K-9 cops: So all I had was a bottle of water and the lady just started yelling at me. But I had to go to the bathroom. Then the cops came, and he put his hand on my shoulder, and I was using the bathroom! I urinated all down my pants cuz my privates wuz hangin out. So now every time I see a cop I start shaking.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Bethany
Business casual male to friend: So I knew I wasn't getting out of there 'till I peed on this guy…
–Chipotle, 13th & 6th Ave
Overheard by: Ewww
Man to friend: Yeah, he went to her christening when she was one… And then he peed on her fifteen years later.
–St. Mark's
Overheard by: Brittany