Bus driver: I'll make a deal with you: exit through the rear door and I'll take you to Treasure Island!
–M60 Bus
Bus driver: We are all in this together. Smoosh up, and hold on for your life.
–M104 Bus
Bus driver, on PA: I hope everyone enjoyed your day and has learned to enjoy all of your days. This is Coney Island, so you might get shot and not be here tomorrow.
–B74 Bus
Bus driver: Now, I'm not naming names, but to the person who had to search through your five dead MetroCards to find the one that worked, you hold us all up. And then, I saw you put the MetroCard that worked… Back in your purse, with non-working ones. Here's a suggestion: get a plastic box from the 99 cent store, put it on your tv. Put the dead cards in the box. Who knows? Maybe it will grow some money.
–Bx7 Bus