Do As I Say, Not As I Wednesday One-Liner

Walkathon girl to girl on bike requesting she moves out of the bike lane: This is for diabetes! You better watch your fuckin' mouth!

–Brooklyn Bridge

Black guy standing in the middle of Grand Central, screaming: No more immigrants, America can't take any more color!

–Grand Central

Woman: Her and her son ain't got no manners. If I was her, I'd have slapped that boy across the face so hard, and told him he ain't gonna get away with shit like that!

–141st & Lenox

Ditzy drunk girl to sober friends: Like, ohmigod, that bitch was soooo wasted. I mean, she was, like, totally wasted. (pause) You guys, you can't even believe how wasted she was! Hahahaha! (pause) Where are we?

–N Train