Sick Day One-Liners

Lady on cell: So do you want French bread, Italian, or salmonella?

–Bay Ridge

Overheard by: sexybysorprize

Sassy black woman to coughing Asian man: Oh, no! Take your coughing somewhere else, I don't want yo' swine disease, asshole!

–Brooklyn

Overheard by: Red Eyed Dream

Blind philosopher: You sighted people are the ones who are at a disadvantage. You need to see. I don't.

–1 Train

60-something woman on cell: That's a much better lymphoma than the other one.

–8th Ave & W 4th St

Commuter lady to another: Did corduroy have seizures *before* he ate the turtle?

–Oyster Bay Train

Overheard by: Squat6971