Wednesday One-Liners Say “Fuck Seatbelts!”

Bus driver: You and your family have a blessed weekend. And remember, you are going to drink, drink a lot.

–Downtown Alliance Shuttle Bus

Overheard by: dara

Bus driver: Step to the back of the bus, please! We have coffee and jelly donuts in the back. We also have gin and tonic, only for the intelligent people who move to the back of the bus!

–M96 Crosstown Bus

Overheard by: BananaBerger

Shuttle bus driver, opening doors: Come, my people!

–Ocean Ave & Newkirk

Overheard by: Jon A.

Bus driver to friend, at intersection, in the pouring rain and bad driving conditions: This is where I got into a huge fender bender, right here in this intersection!

–S53 Bus

Overheard by: ALerns

MTA bus driver: Okay, it looks like we're going the wrong way. We'll have to get back on the BQE. This is the scenic route.

–Brooklyn

Overheard by: woow