One Of the Few Countries the U.S. Never Tried to Invade

Dominican girl #1: Yo, when you go to the Dominican republic, everyone is mad nice to you because they think you are rich and can help them out. Everyone there thinks people in the US are all rich.
Dominican girl #2: Yeah, but they don't know we got poor people here, too.
Dominican girl #1: Word, they think the whole country's rich, like Ireland.

–Vanessa's Dumplings, 14th St