Wednesday One‐Liners Dropped Out of Lamaze

Girl: And it’s, like, strike two. You’re totally not getting a baby gift when I find out you’re preggers on Facebook.

–M23 bus

Suit on cell: My dad was making out with the nurse while I was being born…

–Fulton St

Overheard by: Miss Rach

Homeless lady: God’s pregnant! He wants the city dead! God’s pregnant!

–46th St & 5th Ave

Young boy pumping arms at sides and thrusting pelvis: Fertilize me!