Junkie lady: Excuse me, I need someone to help me. I’m trying to run for President, and I need someone — whaddyacallit — to book my limos and hotels for me and shit.
Librarian: Like a personal assistant?
Junkie lady: Yeah, that’s it! I’m running for President, and the minorities keep telling people that I’m crazy. I’m too busy to fuckin’ beat em with a metal baseball bat, you know, so I need a personal assistant.
–228 E 23rd St
Overheard by: Liberry Lady