Guy: He’s really cool as Chickenhawks go.
–E 15th St, near Stuyvesant Park
Preppy girl: Oh my god, this salad is bangin’, but it needs chicken. I need some motherfuckin’ chicken on my motherfuckin’ salad!
–McDonald’s, Broadway
Mother to daughter: Stand over here. Birds be shittin’.
–Near Penn Station
Overheard by: Checking for pigeons
Guy, looking at man walking duck on leash: That’s just like the duck I used to have!
–Central Park
Man, scared by parrot’s loud screech : What the fuck was that? A duck?
–86th St & 2nd Ave
Man: If I was homeless, I would totally get a big trash bag and stuff it with pigeon feathers. It would be like a big down comforter.
–9th St & 1st Ave
Hipster girl: I know. Pigeon shit and Clorox! If I’m not dead next week it will be a miracle!
–St. Marks & 1st Ave
Overheard by: off white
