Crazy guy on "phone": Yeah… I’m still in New York… I’m still dressed as a bum — you know, so nobody be askin’ me how much money I have… So nobody be askin’ me what I do.
–Burger King
Blind man to butch chick: If you had money, the men would be all over you!
–43rd & Madison
Overheard by: Casey Felago
Worker collecting money for homeless: Donate whatever you got, folks. Anything — a penny, a button, a gum wrapper, one of those awards you won in the fourth grade — you remember those. Come on, folks.
–14th & 4th
Overheard by: Kate Melvin
Clown named "Polka-dots," her humor ignored by young woman: Snot! I probably make more money than you do, anyway! [Honks her horn in chick’s face.]
–6 train platform, Spring St
Overheard by: Allyse
Hipster: So, it’s one hundred dollars just to mount the head?!
–53rd & 9th
Conductor on loudspeaker, after making "suspicious packages" announcement: … And remember, there are only three shopping days left. If you don’t know what to get for people, do what I do — make a list. Then go to the people on the list and ask what they want. Then you say to them, ‘If that’s what you want, give me some money, and then I’ll buy it for you!’
–A train
Overheard by: a fan of train conductor humor
