Son: I’m thinking of an animal now.
Mother: Does it live in water?
Son: No.
Mother: Does it live on land?
Son: No.
Mother: Does it live in the air?
Son: No.
Mother: Does it live in the subway?
Son: Yes.
Mother: Is it a rat?
Son: No.
Mother: I give up.
Son: It’s a homeless person.
–1 train
Headline by: Johnny Utah
Runners‐Up:
· “Better Question: Does It Masturbate in the Subway?” — s m
· “Can We Hunt It for Sport on a Private Island?” — space coyote
· “Don’t Feed It… It’ll Shit Everywhere!” — Hobo Whisperer
· “Homeless: the Other Other White Meat” — Renee
· “New and Improved — Now with Rabies!” — greatly amused