Then He Wiped His Butt on It and Crotch-Walked Down the Street

American history professor: One of the Southern patriots even drafted a proposal to free several hundred slaves and form an army regiment with them in the revolution.
Student: Did it happen?
American history professor: Well he handed it in, but Washington took one look at it and was like “psssssssh, fuck no!”

–Classroom, NYU

Overheard by: kiss martha with that mouth?