Wednesday One-Liners Are Into Water Sports

Tourist guy: Every step is a new adventure! [step] Diesel! [step] Vomit! [step] Urine!

–Times Square

Overheard by: Carrie

Hipster: If you drink someone’s pee ever again, I won’t talk to you.

–45th & Lex

Drunk chick: I demand a urine scent!

–Macdougal Ale House, Macdougal St

Dude: I’m serious, guys, use the bathrooms. No more peeing in bottles!

–Grand Central

Overheard by: eviltwin

Woman on cell: Look, I’m sorry I had to use that kind of language on you, but, yo, how you gonna just whip out your penis and start pissin’ on the train with everyone watchin’?

–Shea Stadium

Overheard by: Juan Chung

Mid-20’s woman: Girl, I had to pee so bad but I figured I’d wait for that nigga to cum, and all of a sudden shit came leaking down my leg and he said, “Damn, girl, you have to get that shit fixed.”

–6 train, 51st St

Overheard by: Jason Labutka