Man: I can’t leave my door unlocked in the Barrio. Someone might sneak in and steal all my spices.
–42nd & Ditmars, Astoria
Man on cell: Now why the fuck would you go and eat my ravioli? Dat’s mine!
–42nd & Lex
Overheard by: Danny
Black tween girl: And that nigga bitch Rihanna thinks she can do ballet? Shit! I can do ballet. The only thing I ever seen that nigga do right is eat fried chicken.
–Q train
Overheard by: kb
Woman: I mean, I would have loved rice. We all would have loved rice.
–8th St between 1st & 2nd
Overheard by: Jaya
Chick: The other day I ate a hot dog, and it had a bone in it. I don’t know what animal they make hot dogs out of, but I’m pretty sure they don’t have bones.
–34th & 7th
Overheard by: seth kleinman
Girl: Food is like candy.
–92nd & Broadway
Shrewd observer: He is either in the Army or chews a lot of gum.
–Ludlow & Rivington
Overheard by: pete Lanpr
Lady: There ain’t no way I’m standing in front of a stove all day making tuna salad. It’s fucking hot!
–104th & Broadway
Overheard by: Fatty McFingers
Queer: Oh my God, cottage cheese is albino diarrhea.
–City Diner, 90th & Broadway
Man to child in stroller: What do you want? You want money? Do you want money or a bagel?
–Absolut Bagels, 108th & Broadway
Overheard by: another jew
Chick on cell: …No, not years of porn, ears of corn! Corn, like you eat!
–Ding Dong’s, 106th & Columbus
Overheard by: Jas
Passionate woman: I just love egg white! It’s like painting to me! The texture, the smell…
–17th & Broadway
Overheard by: Shivvers
Pringles lover: Yeah, he’s, like, all that minus the bag of chips.
–14th St between 5th & 6th
Overheard by: the chips
Big black dude: So tell me, how much would it cost to get a huuuuge jar of mayonnaise, outta state?
–Uptown 5 train