Wednesday One-Liners Look Manly in Tights

Despondent hobo: Spider-Man is dead, mothafuckah.

–Thompson & Bleecker

Overheard by: Emily B.

Earnest white girl: So, I’ve been thinking about it, and here’s what I’m picturing — dat ho is lyin’ flat on her stomach, and Superman is on top of her, but he has to maybe keep his arms out in front of him like he’s in flyin’ position… And it seems like maybe it would be easier to Superman a small person… I bet you could Superman a big girl. Yeah, definitely.

–H&M, Soho

Angry vendor in heavy accent, after police bust nearby: They just arrest him. They arrest everybody. They think they are Superman!

–Greene St, Soho

Overheard by: Rich Mintz

Costumed guy: Two things you never do — you never pull Superman’s cape, and you never kick Spider-Man in the nuts! [To friend dressed as Spider-Man] You are wearing a cup, right?

–13th & University

Overheard by: theresa