Woman: I would bedazzle the shit out of that shirt.
–53rd & 9th
Girl: So, he said he was thinking about getting LASIK, and I told him that if he wants to have surgery he has to start with a nosejob.
–Times Square
Man on cell: Yeah man, I promised for her birthday I’d take her to the best doctor in town. She really needs to have this done. Where did you take yours when she had fleas?
–57th & Broadway
Girl on cell: Oh, I don’t know, the last time I saw you your lips didn’t look that overinflated.
–Washington Square dog run
Overheard by: boswell
