Teacher: Class, let’s get a show of hands — how many of you aren’t loved by your parents? C’mon, someone must be lying here.
–LaGuardia High
Overheard by: mf
Man: This yogurt’s great. My cat loves it — makes him poop like a reindeer.
–Grocery store, 45th & Ditmars
Overheard by: Bob Going
Professor: I love mass law breaking. We should break social contract and go on a class trip to a bar so that I can get my dumb ass fired.
–NYU Silver Center
Lady on cell: He only backs out because he loves you.
–34th & Broadway
Hobo to bag lady: I love ya. Of course I love ya. You want me to fuck ya? I’ll fuck ya right now.
–30th & 7th
Aussie babe watching crying model dressed as a man on Top Model: I love it when they’re upset and dressed up in funny costumes!
–Berry & N 1st, Williamsburg
Girl: I’m not mean! I love everyone. I don’t like everyone… It’s a Christian thing.
–Palladium dorm, NYU
