Four Wednesday One-Liners and a Funeral

Guy on cell: I swear, I told you beforehand. I told you I was married.

–Penn Station

Overheard by: Nicole and Caitlin

Five-year-old: Daddy, how come you ask all those women if they’re married?

–14th & 6th

Overheard by: Caroline McGraw

Woman: I cannot wait ’til the wedding is over so I can go off this fucking diet!

–51st & 6th

Overheard by: jpnyc

Female suit: It’s a funeral, not a wedding, you baboon. Bring your own sandwich.

–59th & 10th

Overheard by: marie