Frat boy: This time the cat wasn’t bigger than my cock at all!
–Union Square
Overheard by: Last time it was, though.
Crazy dude: Cats tryin’ to eat me out here… If you eat me, I’ma eat you, too! I ain’t no snack!
–A train
Overheard by: Marlena Mc
20-ish suit: … Found out my dad murdered my cat when I was kid… He told me it ran away, then he confessed last night at the party. What an asshole! But he got me a dog right after he killed the cat, so it didn’t bother me so much.
–7th St
Chick: We threw my friend a wedding shower that was a luau. It was great — grass skirts, the whole bit. Only 20 bucks a person — really reasonable. We even got these sand terrarium things, which was awesome until my cat decided it would be a great place to drop a load.
–Hill Country BBQ, W 26th St
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Suit on cell: There’s more than one way to peel a cat.
–51st & Broadway
